I found it fitting that weíve jumped a couple of years as it showed how long it took me to come back :P I donít think Iíve mentioned it before, but your style is very different in this story compared to other ones of yours. It has a very classic feel to it, and I really love it. I rarely see it in the fan fiction world but having read most Bronte, Austen and Dickens books I love seeing it here.
Your characterisation of Rose is very different to how we usually see and how, given that this is based on Romeo and Juliet, different it is to what I expected of her. I always viewed Romeo more of the villain out of the pair of them but in this one it seems to be Rose. I think itís from the opening scene when you talk about her being cold and calculating, and itís such a nice twist to the story seeing her being the bad one out of the two.
I feel bad for Scorpius in this section because Rose dominated over him completely and he just seems so forlorn. I could tell by Roseís posture such as her leaning over him that she views herself as superior to him, and the way she spoke seemed to be saying she was looking down on him. That, again, is definitely a twist. With the heightening sense of danger for the pair of them in this chapter itís making me wonder what will happen in the next because I donít see Rose currently killing herself to be with him.
I did like how you tried to humanise Rose a bit by making her care for Hugo. It shows a different side to her and added another complex layer to her which I really enjoyed it. The whole planning for the escape was interesting too, because I thought Rose had possibly developed a heart and then she says she wasnít going because she loved him and she seemed all cold again. I guess the next chapter will only reveal her true feelings.
I enjoyed the scene with Zabini and Montague as it had a different dynamic to it to what Iíve seen from the scenes with Rose and Scorpius. It had a very tense air to it and itís making me more and more eager to find out what happens to them when they attempt to escape. I really loved this line ĎOpinions were dangerous, if not fatal.í As it fitted their situation really well.
That was another fantastic chapter and it left me on such a cliff-hanger Iím off to the next!
Author's Response: Thank you for coming back to read and review! ^_^ It's fantastic to hear that you like the style (it comes through better in these last two chapters, when I had more of an idea what I was doing). At the time I was writing this story, I was working through my reading list of Victorian literature, so "Wuthering Heights" and "Bleak House" proved a major inspiration for both the plot and style of this story. I have a problem where I pick up on the syntax and rhythm of whatever I'm reading or whomever I'm spending a lot of time with, so if I read enough of a period or author, I begin to sound like them. Still not sure whether it's a good or bad thing. ;)
Your reading of Rose is excellent, especially when you discuss how she dominates Scorpius. It is definitely a shift in the typical characterization of Romeo and Juliet, or even Rose and Scorpuis as they usually appear in fanfiction. I wanted to go against stereotype in that regard. Rose's one soft spot is Hugo, whom she has looked after for years because her mother was busy at the Ministry (not that Hermione was a bad mother - quite the opposite - but Rose and Hugo, being so close in age, have always had each other). I'm glad that it helps make Rose a more complex character, that it gives her an unexpected layer. It's not that she has a heart, but if I wanted to put it in those terms, I'd say that Hugo was the only person Rose loves (feels any sort of true affection for).
This part of the story verges on a recreation of the next-generation world as a dystopia. It was the most interesting part of the story to write, and I'd love to try something like it again sometime. It's a world fraught with tension, where all the characters are spiralling down toward their fate, having not yet realized that there's no escape - they're all doomed, much like the atmosphere of a Shakespearean tragedy.
Thanks again! ^_^ It means a lot to hear from you!