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Review:CambAngst says:
I thought this was a really unique and interesting direction for a post-war Harry fic. I've read a lot of them, and I think this is the first I've ever read where he decides to simply get away for a while and leave all of the mourning and drama behind.

Your editing was a bit rough. I spotted a few places where you were missing capitalization of proper nouns and also punctuation, especially around your dialog. Also, the Black house that Harry inherited from Sirius is 12 Grimmauld Place, not 5. Overall, I think you should really consider looking for a beta reader to help you put the spit and polish on your story because the idea is simply too unique to allow little things to disrupt the reader's immersion into the story.

Your Harry struck a nice balance, I thought. He's struggling with a lot of survivor's guilt and other difficult emotions, but he's not a complete, hopeless wreck. He knows that he has a lot of bridges to rebuild with Ginny and the rest of the Weasleys, but he's not quite ready to go there and he suspects -- probably rightly -- that they aren't ready, either.

Ron was absolutely adorable as the newly-emotionally-aware, trying-to-be-sensitive boyfriend. You did a great job with both him and Hermione, actually. Hermione trying to plan and think and organize for the three of them while Ron wanders a bit between being happy for his friends and being hurt that he's not receiving the same level of attention.

I thought Hagrid was a bit hard on Hermione, considering what they'd all just been through. Otherwise, you did a good job with him.

Bill's explanation made perfect sense to me. It is going to be a touchy time around the Weasley household and although he seems to be dealing with his grief better than the others, I'm sure he's also working through a lot of things. It should be interesting to see him journey off into the jungle with Harry.

To summarize, I think you have a great idea here. You just need to work on the execution a bit and this story could really take off!

Author's Response: Desperate for a beta reader!!! lol are you interested?
(Im only half joking btw)

I really really appreciated the feed back too, that was a great detailed review.
I think you're right, the Hagrid to hermione bit isnt quite right, and in hindsight I probably rushed it and tried to condense it too much so it came out a little forceful.

Looking ahead, one thing youve highlighted for me is that in the "trekking through the jungle" scenes, because this is written from Harry's POV there isn't much of Bill "coming to terms" with anything. Bill almost becomes a bit of a caricature... I might have to go back and see if there is anything I can do to improve it.
Ive already put chapter 3 in the queue, but I can work on the rest of it and try and iron it out. Those typos though are going to kill me, I read through it time and time again, and just do not see them until AFTER I've posted.

Thankyou so much for your review, really helpful and means a heap



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