Hello AW! I'm back for another chapter!
You know, I'm going to be blatantly honest when I say that many times in fanfiction, I have to force myself to read and respond to stories. A lot of times they lack readability/reader interest and it's simply becomes a chore. However, you really have that readability factor. You remind me of Mitch Albom. Granted, he's not really your literary, Literature-with-a-capital-L kind of writer, but there's something about his style that makes you want to keep reading. You've definitely got that. All I want right now is to read all of the chapters and leave you a massive, detailed review at the end. That wouldn't be fair, so I'll contain my anxiousness to know what happens!
I enjoyed the bit of Rose we see in this chapter. We see internal monologue, how very observant she is, and that little tidbit about her dreams of becoming a writer. It's a wonderful without being facetious. I think a problem, at least for myself and other writers I know, is that you want your readers to know everything, all at once, about the characterizations. You just want to give every flaw, quirk, and admirable quality they possess; you want to write a three hundred page dissertation. But again, you're such a fantastic writer with so much ability that it's all very intentional and perfect.
And I have to say, the language - I think it's brilliant. There are plenty of people like that. It's one of those little details that are done so well! Oh, also, your use of the word "flumuxed" - I believe it's spelled "flummoxed." But anyway, I love that word! I like to think that some words are simply more awesome than others and that makes my list!
A nonsensical ramble and not a bit of CC (no need for it!), but I hope you know how much I enjoyed this chapter! Excellent!
Author's Response: Hi, Shelby! I was so excited when I saw you posted another review!
I like honesty in reviews, and being honest back, I'll take readability over Literature-with-a-capital-L any day. I know I'll never write "Literature." It's just within the scope of my ability. I appreciate it, but I can't create it. I'm happy to strive for easy and entertaining. My favorite books are the ones where you don't notice the language, so "readable" is about the best compliment I can ask for!
I'm so glad you liked the way this chapter did and didn't introduce Rose. I've been struggling with backstory on my current story, what to reveal and when, so it gives me a great boost of confidence to know I made some okay choices with this story. It's so true about finding that balance! You want the readers to connect with your characters right away, but you also know the true tension comes from the unknown.
Gah! My not so dirty little secret... I am a terrible speller! Thanks for pointing that out. No worse way to ruin a great word than by spelling it wrong.
Thanks for the lovely review. I really appreciate it!!