Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:teh tarik says:
Hello there, Kiana :D

Saw you had a new Barty Crouch Jr. oneshot and couldn't resist...even if I should be doing other things right now. Barty is one of my favourite Death Eaters, and he's also a bit of an anomaly when compared to the rest of VOldemort's supporters. He played a crucial role in Voldy's resurrection and return to form, and yet he disappears after the fourth book and is never heard of again (though, of course, we can understand why...Dementor's kiss etc.). Hardly even mentioned. I've always wanted to write him but never really tried.

Anyway, this is a wonderful story! You've pretty much covered the whole of Barty's miserable life, starting with his miserable childhood, when he was ignored by his father and starved of affection, to his miserable teenage years being jeered by the Slytherins, and even in the later years, he's never really accepted by them probably because of his father's reputation, to his miserable adult years being forced to commit such horrible crimes int he name of the Dark Lord. All because of his father's rejection of him. That's a key aspect of his characterisation, and I'm so pleased to see how well you've encapsulated this. It's terribly tragic, because the problem is such a simple one; if only Barty Sr. had noticed his son a little, shown a little kindness...that being said, Barty Jr. himself isn't completely free of blame either. After all, he chose to go down this path, and I think this may be partly a rebellion against his father's beliefs and ways.

And oh, second person POV narration! I like this narrative style a lot, and I think it works wonderfully here in your fic; the style enables a sense of closeness to Barty Jr.'s frame of mind/thoughts/emotions; it makes him more accessible, certainly more vulnerable in a way we haven't seen - not in GoF, at least.

That final climactic moment when Barty goes all out to plead for his life, for his father to save him in front of the wizarding world was so shocking. I mean, we already know what happened, but the way you wrote it was so grim and bleak.

You notice your mother in the crowds, tears pouring down her cheeks like they are beginning to do so on yours. You scream at her, plead with her. She will help you; help you win your father back. She gives you a weak smile before casting her eyes down to the ground.

He doesn't even look at you. His head kept down at the sheet he's reading off. Occasionally, he'll glance to the crowds.

Your use of language was sparse and rather austere, which really reflects the nature of Barty's sentence and ultimate fate. Also, it's a stark contrast to his weeping, screaming state of desperation. Gaahhh.

Anyway, this was an incredibly well-written oneshot, Kiana! A very insightful yet horrifying examination of the life of a Death Eater. Lovely writing ♡


Author's Response: Hi teh and thank you for this wonderful surprise! ♥ (thanks for telling me how to do that by the way, it's a lot more fun to leave reviews now :D)

Pff, I always think of leaving reviews as productive procastination, so don't worry about it! I never really thought of Barty much before I was given him in a challenge. I think it's, like you said, he just disappears in the fourth book. I know he's not dead, but I always viewed him as that. You're making me wonder what happened to his body now! You should definitely write him though, because it was a lot of fun to do so in this one-shot!

I'm really glad that you liked it! I couldn't chose a specific point in his life to write about, because each time I tried to do so it always led to me wondering why he chose to become a Death Eater and the only way I could find out was showing his entire life, hence it being like this :P I'm really glad that you liked the emphasis on his father, because JK showed us when writing the HP series how much your parents choices effect your overall lives and it was interesting to explore this specific relationship in more depth, as it litreally meant that Voldemort could come back to life. I'm really glad that you picked up on the fact that Barty just wanted some kindness from his father. The only time his father was nice to him was because of his mother and then Barty was far too gone to appreciate it.

I've never written in second person before, so it's great that you liked it, because it's incredibly different compared to the other ones. I'm glad that you found his vulnerable, as that's how I view and that's what led to him to what he became. Gah his life is so tragic. Well, when you think about everyone's lives in the books were so tragic!

Yay, I'm glad that you found it shocking! I hate writing climatic bits, mainly due to the climax before them, so it's great that you liked it! I'm really glad that you liked the language, as that part gave the most grief out of the whole story so the grief of it paid off in the end!

Thank you so much for this wonderful review, teh. I read it about two hours ago and I'm still similing away at it! Gah, just thanks so much ♥


Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 940
Submit Report: