Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:CambAngst says:
Hi, there.

This was a pretty amazing story. I love Sirius when he's written really well, and you captured him in a way that felt amazingly true to his characterization from the books. He's tormented by the past and sort of childlike in a way. He seems to feel less animosity toward his family than I'm used to seeing, but that really didn't bother me at all. You made it seem perfectly natural for such a lost and lonely soul.

The same is true for Ginny. I love the inner strength you gave her, and the difficulty she has coping with her experience from her first year of school. Her quiet personality was also much more in line with the way she's portrayed in the first four books. She seems like a very warm, caring person, but with a fiery temper. Beautifully done.

Your supporting characters were also great. Wise and weary Remus was able to help Sirius out at the moment he needed it most. Overbearing mother hen Molly was annoying for all of the reasons I never liked her until she killed Bellatrix and became the baddest mama in HP canon. Bill and George were very well done as protective older brothers, with Bill having more of an advantage of age when it came to rebuffing Sirius's questions. Even Phineas Nigellus and Kreacher were perfectly in tune.

Then came the ending. I loved the way that you changed up the narrative style to make it appropriate to Sirius's death. And it was great to see him reunited with those whose deaths burdened him with so much guilt and grief in life.

Just so this doesn't seem like an endlessly gushy review, I should point out that you need to do some editing. I didn't pick through every typo, but there were enough of them for it to be noticeable. This is such a great story otherwise that I think it would be awesome if you could tidy up those few small blemishes.

Great job. I'm really happy that you came across my story because it gave me the opportunity to find yours. Cheers!

Author's Response: Thank you so much! It means a lot to me that you took the time to write such a long and helpful review. I've had my doubts about this story...I've been teetering between thinking it was good, and wanting it to disappear. I know it needs some serious editing (I've sent it to a beta, but she hasn't replied yet...) and I'll probably go over it a couple more times to fine tune stuff I don't like.
I'm very glad you thought the characters were portrayed well. Apparently I have a thing about characters. I really like to get into their personalities, and figure them out, and sometimes how I end up picturing them isn't necessarily how they are portrayed canonically. My goal is to get them right, however!
Thank you, thank you for the encouragement on the ending. I had a lot of trouble on it. It's written so much differently from the rest of the story; I was trying to make it more battle-y (thus the staccato sentences etc.) than pensive and character driven, but I wasn't sure if the drastic change worked, from quiet , to battle-y, to quiet again. The very, very end troubled me too. Since James and Lily aren't present very often in the books, it's difficult to get a hold on their characters. Hopefully I did it well!
Again, thank you so much for your review. You've helped my out exponentially, confidence-wise!

Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 899
Submit Report: