Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:Lululuna says:
Hi! So I'm finally here for your review, and I'm very sorry about the delay!

I'm really happy to see you updated this story, and I feel like it really needed this chapter to get the suspense and plot flowing. It was a great chapter, and probably my favourite so far. The family dynamics between all the characters are very sweet, and Dom is lucky to have such an amazing support system. I actually think Teddy blowing up at her a little was very justified, as it would be a little too good to be true if he was blindly supportive and patient. After all, he's going through a tough time as well, and Dominique is being distant.

I'm actually really glad you had her go through with the operation. The marks of a good story are how realistic and believable the story is, and I think it would have been unrealistic if Dom found a miracle cure or decided not to go through with it at the last minute. I think a big theme of your story is how she deals with the situation and moves on to live positively, and I think she knows that even if she can't biologically bear children, there are many other options to be happy.

The ending was a shock, I really didn't see that coming! I really like Delilah as a villain, she really fits the stereotype of the ruthless journalist with no morality, and I love it! It's like Dom is a victim of the need for worthy, exciting news in the media, and by becoming a werewolf she'll create a delicious story which so many readers crave. There's a really cool underlying message of how far the media and horror-culture goes.

It was nice to see Dom taking control of her situation in this chapter and pursuing leads on the attack. I also enjoyed the chief werewolf's letter, and felt like I got a good measure of his righteous yet arrogant personality! My only critique is that I thought the revelation of Delilah Jones came a bit too easily. Maybe it would make sense if Dale remembered the description of the woman, not necessarily her name? Then Dom could put two and two together, since the source already knowing her name seems a little too simple. Also, I don't think you need to addition of the "words" the source overheard: the insinuation of Delilah is strong enough without them. You might even consider eliminating the paragraph where Dale assumes that Young was paid to infect Dominique, and let her draw the conclusion herself. It's a very serious accusation to make, and I'd think the consequences for Young if Dale believed it to be true would be worse than simply being kept from doing it again. I hope these comments make sense, I'm only trying to be helpful and help make the story clearer! :)

I'm excited for the next chapter, it looks very exciting! :) Keep up the great work!

Author's Response: Hey! Thanks for reading and reviewing again, no worries about the delay, I am pretty late in responding too, after all!

I make it a point to update every month - usually by the last week of every month =) I am glad you found this believable and realistic. Yeah, I am trying to show that she'll move on to live positively despite everything, and yep as Teddy pointed out, there are other options.

I am pleased the ending caught you off-guard. Delilah is a complex but fun character to write and I am glad you love the whole concept of her being the 'villain'. Indeed, being a part of the media industry myself, I can say the media can be quite ruthless.

Yeah, Dom has to take her mind off the grief and for that she has sprung into action. I am glad you enjoyed the letter - the chief is one pompous and arrogant character yeah. Well, I wanted the revelation to be easy so I think I'll let it stay that way - thanks for the suggestion though. I agree about the 'words' being overheard as being unnecessary, I was contemplating putting them in the first place, but I think I'll remove that sentence now - thanks. Well, I'll look into the part about Young being paid, though I am not sure yet if I want to change it. Thanks for all your suggestions though, you're definitely helpful.

Thank you!


Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 664
Submit Report: