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Review:Aphoride says:
Hey there - stopping by with your requested review! :)

I love the setting and the details and the whole idea of this more and more. You've obviously done a lot of research to find all of the historical information - the clothes, lessons, general details... it's all so wonderful. I liked in particular how you mentioned her uniform - obviously it would be different then from how it is in Harry's time, but it fits so well with the time period and everything, with the lace and long skirt and her wearing boots rather than shoes... yeah, it's fabulous. It really helps bring it all to life and that's great.

Merissa's character is still a little hard to pin down, though I suspect we'll see more of her as a character in later chapters, since this was mostly a sort of event-driven chapter with not much character extension. She seems good, though - I liked how she was curious about the house-elf, and didn't understand things about the wizarding world, and how she's still sort of obedient and kinda spoilt, in the sense that she had things no one else did before she came, with the references to Nanny and things.

I'm honestly not sure about her being given a house-elf for her own. I've always considered the wizarding world to be pretty gender-equal - I remember JKR saying in an interview that magic take physical strength out of the equation - and in all the books it's never implied that anyone is given preferential treatment in general for any reason. Sure, one or two teachers might have a bias towards a house, but I'm a little hesitant to believe that a student would be given a house-elf just because in the muggle world her father is rich. But that's not a very big thing - I'd just make sure there aren't any other things where she gets something special because of her parents ;)

I liked the inclusion of the wandmaker coming to the school to give out wands. It does make sense now I've seen it written, although I'd perhaps have liked an explanation of this in the actual story, you know? Merissa won't understand things, and she seems quite curious, so shouldn't she want to know what's going on? At least, she should wonder, if not ask someone...

A little bit more description, I still think, wouldn't be bad for this. The clothes were great - but what do the corridors look like? Are there less/more paintings than in Harry's time? Are there lots of people around? Is it noisy/quiet? Use the senses when you're talking about things, to describe them, and it'll help back up your plot and characters and will make sure none of that beautiful detail goes to waste :)

Thank you for re-requesting - I'm really enjoying this story, so feel free to re-request again at any time! :)

Aph xx

Author's Response: Thank you very much!

I did spend awhile looking up the information because I do want the story to be as realistic as possible.

For Merissa, I am still trying to find the right balance of doing exactly what is expected and doing what she finds interesting. Music is one example where she wants to learn violin but her mom wants her to learn pianoforte.

My thoughts for the house-elf was not because her father is rich, but more of that she is a daughter of a duke and has a companion to protect her? Or would that be more for when she's older and puts her hair up? I wasn't planning on the house-elf staying with her at all times - like when she's in class or in the common room.

I'm trying to add in where she tries to become a little more independent of her parents - trying to be like everyone else and being called Merissa instead of Lady Merissa.

I've added notes into the chapter to add more detail (and I've put your wonderful suggestion of uses my senses to describe at the very top of the file so I see it as I am writing new chapters) and as to why the wandmaker goes to Hogwarts to give the wands.

Thank you very much for reading and reviewing!


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