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Review:CambAngst says:
Hi, Ral!

Confession time. Two of them, actually. First confession - Somehow I missed your status or chapter updates post when you posted this chapter. So imagine my surprise when I realized that I had two chapters to read! Second confession, which relates to the first - I read both chapters and now I'm coming back to review. I couldn't help myself. How could anybody stop themselves after a cliffhanger like that??

You did a really good job with Draco. I loved the way that he's matured and assumed the mantle of leadership in the Malfoy family. His demeanor was aristocratic and courtly, but there were some little things that made the change even more apparent. The fact that he shakes hands with both Ron and Harry, for instance. Something he never would have done in his younger days. And I absolutely adored the fact that Narcissa put her foot down about Lucius joining any more "secret societies". She turned into such a hardcore mom!

With the benefit of having read the next one, I thought it was clever the way that you had Derek be a little bit insubordinate toward Harry in the meeting. It was a nice, subtle little thing. And Scorpius is being so protective toward Rose now. Awesome! You've really brought him along well in this story.

I was kind of surprised that Rose listened to Scorpius so readily, but I guess all of the death and suffering must have made an impression even on her. She was definitely asking the right questions. Very perceptive, that one! If she and Scorpius stay together -- please let them stay together, K? -- there should definitely be some sort of job for her doing investigative research for her uncle!

The scene at the Burrow was absolutely heart-warming. I loved seeing Hermione and Ginny in roles that felt a lot more familiar. And the way that Ginny's words inspired Rose to make her feelings for Scorpius clear was really inspired. I thought you did a good job with her thought process.

Ah, poor Ron. You didn't make him quite as happy as you were leading me to believe that you would. ;) As always, poor Harry is caught in the middle. I felt almost as bad for him as I did for Scorpius. Nobody needed the extra stress right at that moment. Harry's recollections about his first kiss with Ginny were a nice addition to the scene.

And then the cliffhanger... Very well executed. I expected they would find something or somebody in the house, and you led me right into the next chapter.

OK, so one silly little typo and then one concern that's a little more substantive:

"Fine, go get her, move her to the Borrow. - Burrow

The more substantive concern is that I thought the pacing of this chapter was a little too fast. There was so much suspense and tension building up, and for my tastes you could have drawn it out a bit more. In the Auror meeting, for instance, I thought it would have been nice to do that scene from Scorpius's point of view and let him reflect a bit on his family's role in all of this while the other Aurors pepper Harry and Ron with questions. Then gradually transition into his feelings for Rose and why he feels so strongly about protecting her. The same holds true for Grimmauld Place. That one might have been more interesting from Rose's point of view. Let her make the transition from happy to see him to very concerned about his safety. It would have helped to set up what happens when she kisses him outside of the Burrow. Also, giving each of them a chance in this chapter to reflect on how they feel about the other would have been nicely complimentary.

Overall, your writing had a really nice flow to it. The chapter hummed right along. Aside from that one typo, I didn't see a thing.

I can't believe we're so close to the end! This has been such a fun journey. OK, one more to write...

Author's Response: Hello again!

Ah Draco. I guess I don't have to tell YOU what talented author got me hooked on the character so bad that I just had to have him in this story! And Lucius. He never does learn, does he?

The scene with Rose and Scorpius outside the Burrow was something I had stuck in my head for the longest of times. In a very early draft of the story, that was supposed to be the first Rose/Scorpius romantic moment. But then the scene in Grimmauld Place sort of happened and I couldn't get rid of it. Plus, I can imagine the ScoRose fans would go after me with pitchforks and torches if I left the ship ending like that!

I love your ideas on the whole POV change that could have happened. Why didn't I think of that? I have a very hard time writing fight scenes and action packed scenes. For some reason they don't come natural to me!

Thank you again for the lovely review! I really appreciate it!


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