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Review:Violet Gryfindor says:
Wow, this one-shot is an excellent study of Regulus's mind and heart as he comes to the end of his life. You capture the tragedy of Regulus's story, his sadness and despair as he tries - like really tries - to make those around him proud, to live up to their expectations. But those expectations are much too high. A lot of it is that he wasn't old enough to take on such a role - while I get the feeling in canon that Sirius developed early and was above average in ability, perhaps Regulus was the opposite, a late bloomer, someone who just needed more time to sort out who he was and, perhaps more importantly, who he wanted to become.

It's very much the story of being a teenager. That's one thing I think stands out about your portrayal of Regulus - his thoughts feel accurate, reflecting an adolescent's point of view. You take into account naivety and disillusionment with bits of rebellion. He's confused, trapped between pleasing his parents and striving to become like his brother, and it tears him apart. It's a story about change - Bella and Sirius becoming different people as they reached maturity - but Regulus can't make that same change. He can't choose sides, or rather he doesn't have the power to choose - he never sends those letters, he doesn't know how to act on his rebellious feelings. It fits with Regulus's story in canon, explaining why he turns to Kreacher as confidante and loyal friend. When he does act, it will be for Kreacher's sake, not his own.

Ugh, it's so sad! But beautifully written - it shows that you've taken great care with the words and syntax. There's nothing to critique here! It's great to see how far your writing has come in the last few months, and I look forward to reading more from you in the future. :D

Author's Response: Wow, I'm glad that you found it was great study I didn't intentionally go about trying to analyse him, I just wanted to show his last few days. I think that's the thing I find most tragic about Regulus, the way he tried to make everyone happy, but by doing that he made himself unhappy. I get that feeling too about Regulus, and I think that's probably due to him never taking his own intitiative until he decided to go against Voldemort which resulted in his death.

I'm glad that you felt his thoughts reflected those of a teenager. He really is a complex person, but a fascinating one at the same time so I had a lot of fun trying to figure out what must have been going through his mind at that time. I almost wish we could have seen what would have happened if Regulus reached maturity, but then that would take this alluring factor away from him which draws so many people to him.

I'm glad that you can see that my writing's improved. When I go back and read some of my older unedited work it really makes me cringe. But I have to give a big shout out to my amazing beta pixileanin who has helped me so much! Thank you for this fantastic review :D

-Kiana


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