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Review:patronus_charm says:
Hey Madi! I saw that your one-shot needed some love, so I decided to stop by and give it some :D

Aw poor Neville, I really felt for him throughout this story. You could really sense the panic he must have been feeling, and you just wanted to go and hug him to make him feel better all over again.

I really liked your characterisation and I felt that they all matched the canon characters really well, which was great as I often find that's not the case. I think the best one was Dumbledore as he just seemed so Dumbledore.

The only CC I would give is to watch your tenses. Here for example 'Is it because I lost Trevor again? Oh dear me, it probably is! I canít help it if my memory isnít very good! Gran even got me that Remembrall to help, but I donít know where it is anymore. Stumbling up the stairs to the dormitory, I put my books away, nearly tripping over stray clothes on the way out.' You switched from past to present quite a lot throughout that paragraph and several others, so you may want to go back and make it uniform :)

Other than that I really enjoyed this one-shot as it was so lovely to see young Neville again, and his characterisation was great!

-Kiana

Author's Response: Aw thank you for the great review! :D I didn't really pay very much attention to my tenses as I just kind of wrote this and posted it to make sure it was up before the deadline of the challenge! I will be sure to go back and edit it at a later date, along with my other one-shot Slytherin Match, which features Pansy and Blaise. It makes me feel great as an author that you think I characterized them all correctly, as I'm constantly worrying that I didn't say something right or they did something awkward. Thanks again for the great review! :) xx
~MadiMalfoy


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