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Review:AlexFan says:
Hello there!

Okay, this is a great start to a story, it really is, your grammar was great and so was your punctuation. What I would suggest is adding some more description to this and slowing things down. The scene with the teacher went by really fast and, in my personal opinion, I thought that you could've slowed it down a little bit and added in some more description.

Also, you might want to mention what time period this is because from what I've gathered based on the dialogue is that this isn't modern day Hogwarts.

Besides that I actually really enjoyed reading this. I loved how the teacher wasn't backing down from Merissa's father and was standing up to him.

Good job on the first chapter!

Author's Response: Thank you! :)

I do have an update being validated at this particular moment, but I will go back and revise the chapter to include a little more description. I will also take another look at the scene with the teacher to see how I can improve.

The time period is towards the late Victorian era.

Having the teacher standing up to Merissa's father was pretty fun to write.


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