I am annoyed. This is annoying. Not you, or the writing or anything, I mean I am actually annoyed right now that this stupid bloke doesn't just TELL FRED WHERE HE IS AND HOW TO GET TO THE NEXT STEP.
Sorry, I feel a bit better now that I've gotten that you, though. Really though, you absolutely did your job with this purgatory/limbo sort of place and creating the combination of frustration, fear, and down right anger. I was getting so fed up with the Fred/George but not Fred/George thing answering every question with a question. I mean, this boy has suffered enough. Though I suppose he doesn't even realize he's suffered because he doesn't remember what happened or anything he left behind...
Good god. You're giving me a seriously mind twist over here. In the best way possible, because I love when stories twist me up and make me really think. The fact that you managed to tell this in such a state of confusion, but still narrating it clearly, is so awesome. I've seen a lot of times when people try and get across this sort of extreme unknowing, it almost comes across as sloppy writing that hasn't been given enough care into what it's trying to say. But this.. my gosh. You writing is gorgeous like always, but more than that you know what you want to say and you say that clearly. You leave the character confused and the reader confused because Fred feels that way, not because of your writing. And that's such an awesome talent.
You took us back into these small memories of Fred's, though I suppose they aren't even so much memories because he still barely remembers a thing, in a really smooth transition in and out of the fog. I think keeping Forge in there, calling out while Fred is inside the sort of memory, was the perfect touch to tie them all together. In my head I have this really awesome visual of him going through these but still surrounded by the fog and a Forge off in the distance.
I promised myself I would make your review a million times more intelligible than my responses to your reviews, but now I'm blabbing on trying to get across how much I love this.
I'm excited to read the new chapter two. I hope when you rewrite it and switch the order, you'll PM me so I can come back and read all four in the new order!
As always, gorgeous job you amazing author, you.
Author's Response: JAMI ♥
Your review has pretty much PUREED ME GAH ♥ Honestly, all your lovely compliments mean so much to me you have no idea, so thank you so so much!
Yup, this chapter is definitely meant to be a bit of a mindtwist. It's because the story got out of hand - I mean originally this whole thing was just meant to be a quiet drama (with grief and all that) about the Weasley family post-Battle dealing with Fred's death and all...but somehow, aahh, something happened to the story :P And now I've begun writing Limbo.
That weird annoying Forge character that makes everyone want to push off a cliff is sort of inside Fred's head, and is /probably/ an extension of Fred's personality, and of his lost self. Hope this makes sense :P
And all those memories, they're kind of wrong. I mean, they're essentially right (the Weasleys did go to Egypt for a holiday and all) but they've been warped, whether through his sudden shocking death wiping out all traces of his earthly existence, or by something else. At any rate, whatever poor dead Fred is experiencing is certainly more than just regaining his memories and all :P
If all that sounds confusing to you, it's my fault :P I'm really experimenting with things and ideas in this fic, and hopefully some of them will work :)
Thank you for this amazing review, Jami! Of course it's intelligible! And I'm so excited that you're excited to see the changes ^.^ It will be some a few weeks before I get down to changing stuff, but I'll let you know! Thanks again *hugs*