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Review:patronus_charm says:
Look at me go leaving all these reviews today! I am here with your fifth and final review.

I really loved the imagery you used in this chapter, I can just picture the French countryside and Edith cycling over the cattle grid. As well as creating vivid descriptions it also created vivid sounds in my head too, which was really great.

I really liked Edith’s characterisation it’s really developed and you’ve created a well-rounded person. I can see, now, why someone like her would end up with Moody. They’re both so feisty and proud that they’re the perfect match for one another. I liked learning about her past; too, as it meant that I had clearer idea of her in my head.

I loved the meeting of Alastor and Edith it fitted both of them so well. I can just imagine her trying to tell Alastor that his appalling French was unnecessary and that she could manage in English. I was wondering how they first met, and I was glad with the result as it was unexpected yet fitting both of them. I can see that they’re probably going to having quiet a fiery relationship which fits their personalities really well. Then the interrogation scene was perfect too!

A minor note on the French of a bientot, as the review box doesn’t like accents I’ll do my best to describe it here the a should have a an accent grave on it and the o should have an accent circumflex :) As I mentioned in one of my previous reviews you should perhaps look over the grammar you used with dialogue as I noticed a few spots where periods where needed instead of breaks :)

That was a really good chapter and I’ve enjoyed reading your stories :D

-Kiana

Author's Response: It took me ages to find the phrase 'cattle grid' since I didn't know what they were called :P I ended up asking my dad- the internet is useless when it comes to finding words with nothing to go on. I've never been to the French countryside, but I've seen plenty of the English countryside, and it's just beautiful and I wanted my readers to see that beauty too.

She has this ferocity within her, she's in every sense a fighter, yet she keeps it reigned in and composed. When she unleashes that ferocity, you'd better start running ;)

That was one of my favourite bits, Edith is a character who enjoys being on top and having more information that others. Their relationship is central to this story, but in a way, in reality their relationship is minor compared to the events that will lead them to having a relationship. Sorry if that was a bit confusing :P

It takes me a while to add accents to words in word since I have to go to the symbols box, find the symbol, yada yada. I honestly thought that I added the grave and circumflex though , but apparently not... perhaps next time I will add the accents as I'm writing so that I don't forget :P

Thanks for the lovely reviews Kiana!


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