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Review:TenthWeasley says:
Hello! Here for you from the review tag!

I'm not a huge fan of next generation and I don't read a lot of it, but I thought I'd give this story a try for you. You've set up quite an interesting premise for the story already and deftly skirted the arranged marriage issue, so bravo on that. :)

Your original character seems spunky and has a lot of character, and it's clear that you enjoy writing her -- which is always a good thing to be able to tell! I've never read someone quite like her, either, and uniqueness and originality are good things to have to set your character apart.

A thing I would comment on is that you do sometimes tend to overuse commas when they aren't needed. As an example:

The room, itself, is heavily decorated with antiques -- The word "itself" doesn't need to be separated by commas, and there a lot of similar instances throughout your story when you separate a single word with commas when you don't need to. Sometimes it is necessary, and it's a bit tricky to set out rules for when to use them and when not to. Commas are always tricky, and there are about a thousand and one rules on how to use them. Study the books you read and how the authors use commas in their writing there -- reading books is the best way to learn how to write yourself! It's how I did it.

The spaces for this chapter are also rather big, but I used to have that issue as well! Nothing a bit of formatting can't fix, but it's just something to be aware of.

Anyway! I hope this review has been of some help to you. :) And I'll be seeing you around!

Author's Response: Heyy, thankyou soo much. I will surely take you up on the advise I have some comma issues to be honest :p
BUT IM SO GLAD THAT YOU LIKE MY CHARACTER cause she's who I am in real. It's kinda fun imagining yourself in such situations to be honest. And as you find her unique, *free cookies for you* :D
Thankyou once again.
Em


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