|Review:||Toujours Padfoot says:|
Have not read a single line except for the chapter title, and right off the bat IS THIS FROM SEVERUS'S POV, BECAUSE I NOTICE IT'S HER LAST NAME AND NOT HER FIRST NAME, AND THAT SEEMS A LITTLE SEVERUS-WITHOUT-HIS-MEMORIES WHILE HE STUDIES HER FROM AFAR. (or perhaps not from afar. -gasp-hyperventilate-excitement) !!!
Well, you go right ahead and crawl into that gutter for several years, Mr. Black. (And I will come with you.)
Oh my goodness, what is going on. Is that Severus. What if one of them is Beth and she's disguised in a cloak and she and Severus have secretly already recovered his memories. Okay I know this cannot be true but you can't blame me.
OMG THEY'RE GOING TO KILL BETH.
What. Was that really Severus? What. Maybe he's going to have her followed. Maybe he thinks she tampered with his memory. Maybe he thinks the Order got one over on him.
Maybe there was a Death Eater called Bridger...
A-HA! I KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON. !!!
Sirius's unwillingness to admit to James that he was the reason Beth and Severus were found out makes me distinctly uncomfortable. I understand why he's embarrassed, why he would prefer for no one else to find out, but...it's this sort of secrecy that becomes ammunition for his own condemnation when it comes to light that the Potters were betrayed. He had also betrayed Beth, and to Beth it might not seem that far-fetched for Sirius to have done the same to James and Lily. After all, he was pretty good at hiding what he'd done. It would make him look all the more damning, make him look all the more capable of being a traitor. And my heart just dropped into my stomach when I thought - what if Beth doesn't forgive Sirius? What if they don't make amends before Lily and James die? Beth will walk away thinking that she never knew him at all.
And you know, it really is a wonder that Peter wasn't tempted to "discover" the Death Eaters' headquarters so that he would get credit from the Order for actually being useful. His yearning for recognition seems to be dwarfed by his yearning for protection, I see. Ugh. You know, I would be totally okay if you went super AU and turned him into owl food.
Eeep! They're just going to go for it! James and Sirius are very nervy. And if I'm not mistaken, I think quite a lot of Sirius's motivation to get those memories stems from the desire to earn Beth's forgiveness. He may not be that good with words and apologies, but when it comes to actions you're always able to show us how big his heart is. ♥ I love Sirius so much, even when he's being an interfering little trout. He is just always the best.
Sometimes I think about how unfair it was that he never had a trial and I wonder why he didn't tell everyone about Peter, and allow them to give him Veritaserum so that he'd have some proof, and then I remember that my willpower cannot change canon and I get frustrated. WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM IS JUST NOT FAIR. :'(
SAME TIME NEXT WEEK, OKAY. OR, YOU KNOW, A LITTLE EARLIER WOULDN'T HURT. :D
Author's Response: Fair warning: This response is going to be lousy. BUT YEAH, YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON. ♥ There's more here than meets the eye! Sirius just happened to be in the right place at the right time, overhearing all this information...
He's kind of a little snot, though -- cowardly, for sure. He is a very rose-colored glasses type of man in that he likes to pretend that everything is fine, that the war's not so bad, that tensions aren't high among the Order and among his friends as well. I think if Sirius could get out of telling people he made mistakes, he would -- and yet you're absolutely right in that that was what sort of destroyed him in the end. He obviously didn't tell anybody else about his suspicions regarding Peter, and it makes me wonder why. NOT EVERYTHING NEEDS TO BE ESPIONAGE AND RIDDLES.
Let's be real -- there are a lot of holes in the Marauder era of things, and the less I think about them, the less headaches I have. ♥
You are very right about Sirius's motivations to reclaim Severus's memories, too! If he didn't see something good out of it -- namely winning Beth back to his side -- I don't think he'd do it. One must remember that he essentially thinks Severus is lower than scum, but he is (slowly) reaching a James-like point where he's putting Beth's mental health before his own schoolboy grudges. Actions always speak louder than words.
Someday I will write a Sirius/Sarah AU and he'll have no worries ever, and you can feed him grapes and dance to 80's music together, and the world will be sunshine and roses. ♥
YOU'RE THE BEST.