Iím a cheater. I read ahead ;(. This is why I donít like reading ahead. It takes me too long to get back to reviewing.
I know Iíve said this a million times, but I really love the dynamic between the siblings. Lily being so sure her brother told on her, already expecting it as she came into the kitchen. Youíve made me very hungry with the start of this, by the way. And I love the sort of peace over the Potter house right now. Is everything dandy? Well, not from Lilyís PoV, but itís still a quiet Saturday morning and there arenít enough of these in stories.
Oh sheís so tangled up with Scorpius thoughts. I love her being willing to do just about anything though. I know Iíve been there, when Iím so upset about something that I just canít handle thinking about it so taking a way out of your own mind is something I wouldnít so no to. Having Lily feeling that way just felt very realistic to me. She canít really do anything right now. Sheís angry with Scorpius, sheís grounded, sheís already in over her head with all this... whatís she supposed to do to fix it? Nothing. So instead she needs a way not to think about it, and I have to say I think the way was very creative. Iím so excited to see Luna and to see her close to the Potter clan. I love Lilyís analysis of the family and Mr. Scamander being the odd one out in a family of already odd people. Iíve always seen him described as sort of nerdy, but I really love your version. In my mind, this man and Luna would make a very lovely couple.
And in one sentence:
ďSee, I knew they wouldnít be late,Ē Luna said in way of a greeting.
Youíve gotten completely to the heart of Luna, haha. That was just so right. And we get a James appearance! Hahaha I canít say Iím crazy about Liza though... Iím sure the Potters often arenít crazy about their eldest sonís girlfriends if this one is any indication of previous ones ;).
I also loved that thought Lily did seem to enjoy her party, she wasnít over the moon or anything. Like she thinks, sheís seventeen. She clearly appreciates what was done for her loved her family clan, but at the same time sheís seventeen. Not your ideal Ďget wild coming of age party.í
Okay. Iím giving myself an F for running reviews. I figured since Iíd already read the chapter it would be easier - nope. Sorry, I got too into it and now the chapters over again. Haha. This is your fault. If your writing was easier to stop reading, I would be able to comment on it.
This chapter is one that really makes me want to shout at you for not having this complete. Everything is all tangling together with the twins and Severus and the break in and Scorpius and LILYíS PARENTS NOT LISTENING TO HER. I really felt for her with that one. You know, you couldnít give me enough money to make me go back to being a teenager.
Youíve just thrown me in the middle to Ďmust know what happen,í world and Iím going to have to start poking at you after I review the next chapter. Youíre a very talented writer, you know. Iíll admit that I do enjoy your adult characters more... you have such a skill for crafting them so perfectly and making them people that Iíd want to know (or not know, in Reginaís case). But I still really love your younger characters.
Writers block please go away, please!
Author's Response: lol, I'm the same way. I can't be trusted with reading ahead!
Writing Luna and James and the gang was a lot of fun. I wrote this chapter way before I started OtE, so this was my first time playing with a lot of these characters. I guess I'm lucky in that other people's characterizations don't get stuck in my head very often, which leaves me lots of room to make them act however I want :P
It didn't seem right not to mark Lily's birthday with some sort of celebration, since this is such a big one in the wizarding world. But it also didn't seem right to suddenly throw in a bunch of made-up friends we'd never heard of before for her to go off and celebrate with. I can't imagine Luna being "hip" to what anyone wants in a party, let alone a teenage girl... but Lily appreciates the gesture in a you-REALLY-shouldn't-have kind of way.
Based on the two stories, I like my adult characters better too! Part of it, I think, is that some of this was written a while ago. While you'll never get me to admit that I actually LIKE anything I've ever written, I will say I do think I've improved over time. But also, I was really bad at being a teenager. I didn't do any of the fun, rebellious stuff at ALL, so I have a harder time taping into teenage angst, I think.
Plus, logistically, it's just been harder to write. I needed Scorpius to be 18 to make all the arrest stuff work, but to stay with canon, that would make Lily 16/17, when I really see her in my head as closer to 14/15. I think I write her too young at times, but also having a 14 year old child of Harry and Ginny Potter running around unsupervised didn't seem very realistic.
Haha! Okay, I just veered way off-topic. Sorry about that. Thank you for the lovely review. I did manage to write about 300 words yesterday. Certainly not enough to knock anyone's socks off, but at least it's something!!