Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:TheHistoryGirl says:
This was so lovely to read; I'm nearly crying myself just thinking about Fred's death now. I'm really happy that you've kept him in the front of Ginny's mind despite everything else that happened during the night of the battle. It seems realistic that he would be the first thing that she would think of (even before the love of her life). Your characterisation, in my opinion, is definitely spot on for both characters. It's clear that you've dedicated your time to doing an effective job of it so kudos for that.
I got really teary when Harry told Ginny about Fred's death and Percy's joke; that was such a creative and lovely way that he chose to console her.
I love the way you've portrayed their relationship. Three words: credible, sweet and creative. Good job.
I did notice a few typos here and there; they're all very minor but for the sake of being constructive I figured I might as well point them out to you.
"We we're looking at what she lost what we both lost.">>> After lost a full stop would work really well to emphasize the poetic effect.
"I just want my big brother to make me laugh like he has my whole lifeÖ">>>this should be 'like he has done my whole life'.
"I canít always sit with my head on my momís shoulder." >>>Just pointing out the Americanism for the sake of characterisation
Other than that though this was a really good first chapter! Thanks for recommending it!
THG
PS: I apologise in advance if the quotes have pasted strangely. Just pay attention to the errors that I've pointed out specifically in the annotations.

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I really appreciate both what you loved and the constructive criticism. I've always liked the idea of taking sweet memorable moments from the books and including them in my stories, that seems to be what people love, including myself! I'm so glad to have evoked some emotion from you, that's a goal any writer has :D I'm sorry it had to be sad this time, but it's realistic.
Thanks again for pointing out the errors!


Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 815
Submit Report: