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Review:HallowsAndHorcruxes says:
The plot is going along nicely at the moment keeping a good place so that it doesn't rush past anything and is helping get the importance of what has just been discovered by Lily across. You haven't rushed or hurried the details out which helps to make the storyline more interesting.

The flow overall is good though in a few places I must admit that it feels like a word has been missed out when typing. It's something that happens to me too so just make sure to read things again but slowly and you should pick them up. I also noted that in the bathroom scene when Lily says she and Rose didn't ask to get pregnant it says Rise instead of Rose.

As for characterization while they aren't how I personally would characterize Lily and Rose due to the situation they are in/ have been through I think it is fitting to your story. Though I do love the little sisterhood chemistry shown between Lily, Livi and Kayl in there little room as it helps to lighten the story a little and bring a bit of hope.

~Hallows!

Author's Response: Hey,

Thank you once again!

Whoops, I'll be more careful to check when I edit.

They pretty much are like sisters, Lily's know Kayl since she was little and Livi since first year.


-Potterfan310
Soph :)


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