Hello there, I was just messing around on the forums, and I stumbled across this beauty!
I really love the repetition of your theme of light throughout, talking about how Sirius was bright where Regulus was not, and constantly representing strength as light, especially using the words "burning bright" and fading." The continuous motif really tied the whole thing together.
Speaking of the light thing, I like how Regulus continuously calls what most refer to as the "dark side," Voldemort's side, as "the side which shone light." It really shows how much influence the people Regulus spends time around influenced him.
I love that he wanted to make Sirius proud, and that you portrayed him as the weaker of the two, the one who bent to the will of others, rather than having him openly chose Voldemort's side.
He's a rather complex character, for just a one-shot, because you can clearly see the split mindset he possesses: he wants to please everybody around him, like Bellatrix and his parents, but also Sirius, who is on the completely opposite side of things.
I love how you tied in the astronomy to this, talking about Sirius not only being brighter in personality, but also in a more literal sense, referring to the Dog Star.
As for CC's, I don't really have any, other than the few little grammatical things I noticed, like "He was the good the one." I think that should be "He was the good one."
This was extremely well-written and very entertaining to read! Great job! :)
Author's Response: Haha I'm glad that you were messing around the forums as this review made my day :D
I can't express how glad I am that you liked the repetition, I was sitting here thinking god the readers are going to hate me, as it will be boring, so I'm glad that you liked it.
Yes I always found it interesting how each side viewed themselves as the good one, and it would be interesting to see what would have happened if they had won. It also shows how conflicted he must have been!
I didn't want Regulus to seem as if he purposefully choose that side, and that he just wanted to please people, and that he wanted to do everyone proud. I think that's the most tragic thing about him.
I'm glad that you liked the astronomy tie, it was fun to do! As for that error, I'll go and get rid of it and thanks for pointing it out :)
Thank you so much for the review,