Iím just going to combine my reviews, and leave some here and there due to time constraints and me wanting to get to the end ASAP ;D
I really liked the excerpt at the beginning of the chapter. In so many fan fictions thereís a book/article published and we never get to read which is rather annoying in my opinion, so I was glad to see it included here. And we got to learn more about Viktorís background, and it was such an interesting and different way to find out things!
Well Joseph Heart certainly sounded formidableÖ. I loved the mention towards Hagrid though, and how he came out as a winner in a drinking game, I canít wait to see if there any more future references towards him! Then there was Regina McFey! Her stories reminded me of the ones which you can find on the free Kindle downloads page!
I felt rather sorry for Rose in this chapter. She just seemed so innocent, and so young compared to everyone else at her work. But I think thatís what made the work environment work so well, as you could see how something between her and Krum would then develop, if she was so used to dealing with odd people. The mix of people at her work seemed to balance really well though, and I liked how they all had fiery personalities as Iím sure itís going to lead to some interesting stuff later on!
I remember you mentioning that your Albus was dating a girl called Amelia as well, so I was really interested to learn more about her! I liked how you wove in details about both of them in this chapter, such as Rose not earning much money, and Al being restless. It was so nice not to see it done in a really obvious because when itís done like that it almost scares me.
I thought it was interesting that there was some tension between Al and Harry. I feel as if most people are too scared to show Harry in a bad light, but I really like it. I canít wait to see how that develops, and whether thereís any more history behind the two.
I liked how you made Rose stick to her principles. If I was in her position I would be dying to write that book for Krum, as it would be such a big scoop for her, but I liked how you made her reject it. It reminded me of Hermione, and how she wouldnít have done something unless she fully agreed to it. I liked how Heart valued her though, as you almost wouldnít think he would with his harsh demeanour, but youíve developed a really multi-faceted character here, and I canít wait to see more of him!
Iím still on the fence over whether I like this Peter Brook person or not. Thereís just something about him, which puts me off him for some reason. I canít explain it, itís just a thing! I liked the mystery behind Krum though; Iím guessing itís either financial problems, or something related to his drug taking! Either way, I canít wait to find out :D
I should have carried on reading as I found out straight away, but I was right, it was financial problems! Brookís is his step-son though? I certainly wasnít expecting that, and I canít wait to learn more about Krumís previous relationships, as they certainly sound interesting!
I almost felt sorry for Rose, with her thinking she could get out of it. I can understand why she would be offended by being called a Ďpretty little writerí, I wouldnít want to be recognised for my looks, I would want to be recognised for my talent. At least Peter made it up later, with talking about how she was reputable and published.
And there was the first encounter! I was wondering when it was going to happen, and I loved Krumís intro it was just great. I think it was the whole outlandishness by offering to buy the whole place drinks, only an ex-quidditch star whoís in debt would do that.
Itís proven to be an excellent start so far!
Author's Response: I'm so glad you like the book excerpts. Since the book is such a major part of the story, I thought it might be nice to use some of the actual passages to convey a bit of Krum's backstory.
Heart is a little over the top, I'll admit, though he has his more mellow moments in later chapters. Hopefully he balances out okay over the course of the story. Regina will return as well. And I know exactly what books you're talking about! When I first started writing this, it was the middle of all the 50 Shades hoopla. I may or may not have "borrowed" a little inspiration from that.
I'm so glad you liked the bits with Al. He doesn't have a lot of "screen time" in the story but he's one of my favorite characters. I tried really hard to give the reader a bit of a glimpse into Rose's life here without bogging the story down with too many details. I'm really happy it didn't feel too obvious or heavy-handed. Harry pops up later in the story, but his role isn't too big. I did try to show that all the characters have good and bad sides, so hopefully that's something that carries through the other chapters too.
I'm with you. I would have wanted to write the book too! But Rose doesn't really have the confidence yet to take the risk. I'm glad that Heart's support of her came through here. He comes off pretty crass at times but he really isn't meant to be a terrible guy.
I love reading that you're not totally sold on Peter yet. He's definitely meant to be a character you're just not sure about, at least at this point in the story. He certainly doesn't exactly go out of his way to endear himself to Rose. But hopefully by the end of the story (if you read that far), you'll have a better feel for him. And Krum's past relationships will definitely be a major part of future chapters. Hopefully they prove to be interesting.
I know the set-up is a bit long but I'm so happy you liked their first meeting. I tried to make it worth the wait. It is pretty audacious of him, but I really wanted to make Krum's entrance into Rose's life a memorable one
Thank you so much for such an incredibly lovely review!