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Review:Courtney Dark says:
Hey! Sorry about my random spazzy review thread - it seems like I only have time to read and review on weekends now, which sucks.

Anyway, your stories are always so different and creative, which I love, and it seems as though this one is no different. There was definitely a huge element of darkness in this chapter, which was great to see, and I am now looking forward to finding out how each character links to your other's going to be exciting to find out!

Anyway, I think my favourite character so far is Rosenelle, mainly because I love dark characters who aren't wholly good. I love that sinister air that Rosenelle has, and how I've already learnt so much about her, merely from the memories she shares about her mother and the way she aims to get what she wants. I also LOVE the fact that she's a sort of criminal, and the line: 'Pain was second nature to me, pain made me feel alive. It made everything real.' I felt like it hinted at the fact that Rosenelle had had some sort of great pain in her past, perhaps that had caused her to be the way she is now? I don't know really, but I can't wait to find out!

Roseanna was also a great character, and I liked the way you developed her poor relationship with her parents. She and Rosenelle definitely seem very different - in fact, they seem almost completely opposites, and I'm interested to find out more about her odd sounding relationship with Louis. I wonder how the two of them met? I was also so sure it was Scorpius, so when I found out that it was Louis, who is not written about an awful lot, I was pleasantly surprised.

And finally, the last of the three girls, who we do not yet know the name of. This was a very mysterious, intriguing section and I am super eager to know more about her! Again, she seems completely different from the other two characters. I am certainly impressed that you have managed to create these three very individual girls. I wonder what will happen when they first interact?

Anyway, I thought this was an excellent first chapter - mysterious without being too confusing, hooking and dark. There were a few spelling and grammar errors, but nothing too distracting. Nice job!


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