ShadowRose again! Well, let's jump into this...
I like that both Sirius and Thalia are basically having the same thoughts regarding the other - it creates a really cool parallel.
George's and Thalia's date was cute, and George seems like a genuinely nice guy. Too many stories on here have the first guy as a total [insert word of your choice here], but I like that yours actually went well.
I love the dynamics between Mary, Maia, Alice, Lily, and Thalia. They just play off of each other really nicely, and it proves to be rather entertaining.
One question: is Narcissa Black's presence at Hogwarts during this time part of canon? I've always thought she was older than the Marauders, being that Lucius was around in Riddle's days, but I could be wrong. :)
That confrontation between Sirius and Thalia during their dates was perfection. You could feel the tension between the two, along with the awkwardness that their dates were feeling. It was great.
I really don't like Thalia's mom. She seems horrible. Is it bad that she made me think of one of my stories? It seems we've had the same idea regarding our OC's mothers. :)
I love how you throw in random Muggle references throughout. With the presence of Muggleborns, I feel like there should be more of them in stories, but sometimes the topic is just avoided altogether...
The "some idiot" that ransacked George's trunk... I don't think I even need three guesses for that one. :)
Whoa, I really wasn't expected the scene with Mary. Wow. Just... wow. For a high-pressure situation like that, it was really well written. For one, I like that you didn't have someone use an Unforgivable on her. Instead, you use some other form of dark magic (sectumsempra was my first thought). You also portray the characters in this situation really well - especially Thalia. She goes from being frantic to breaking down into tears, which is really realistic, although rather depressing to read.
Wow. This was a GREAT chapter.
Author's Response: Yes Sirius and Thalia have a lot of parrallels between them, I did it in the prologue so I felt the need to carry it on here, so I'm glad that you liked it!
Yes the OC boyfriend does always seem to be mean, but I didn't want to do that, as George in my head always seemed lovely, so I couldn't make him a baddy. Sirius will just have to wait his turn.
I'm glad that you liked the girls interactions, I was worried they were a little dull, so yay they're not :D
With Narcissa Black, it's said in the Prince's Tale, that Lucius was a 5th year when they were in first. In my story Narcissa is in her 7th year, making her 3 years younger than Lucius, so I figured it would work :)
Haha I'm glad that you liked the confrontation, it was just needed so we could see the tension ;)
I know I read a muggleborn story, and it's like where are the muggle things in it? Also every girl has to get ready with music on!
Haha yes you're right with the trunk!
I'm so glad that you liked the scene with Mary. I've never been in a situation like that before, so I just had to guess, so hearing this is just great.
Yeah it was sectumsempra you'll found out all the details in the yet to be written chapter 12 (well I think you will!). I'm glad that you liked the portrayal of the characters, I thought it was a bit OTT with her crying, but I'm glad that it was realistic. I'm sorry it was depressing :(
Thank you for another amazing review,