I really liked how you did the Quidditch trials from a spectator's point-of-view. Usually, it's either from a player or not at all, so I like seeing it from this angle as well. Although, there was really much more than just the trials going on. :)
I like how Sirius and Thalia's banter has changed since the first few chapters. It's more friendly and with less enmity. It's kind of a slow evolution that you've started.
Foreshadowing. I love it. For one, Lily's defense of Severus, saying he was "perfectly nice." It's just a reminder of what's to come. Also, Mary's line "haven't been any Gryffindors which have defected to the dark side yet." And all I can do is sit here and think, Peter's literally at the table.
Speaking of Peter, poor guy. Always getting picked on. I mean, he's definitely an easy target, and it makes sense, but I always feel a little bad for him. But then I remember his betrayal, and my sympathy goes *poof*.
Hah, I love Lily's wink, and the confusion it caused. I was just sitting here giggling at how both Thalia and Sirius were just so confused.
I'm really interested to see where this storyline with George goes; he seems like an interesting character. I do like that George isn't a replica of the Quidditch-obsessed Oliver, but Percival is.
I'm starting to like Thalia more. She really seems like a deep character. Another thing I like is the subtle similarities between Sirius and Thalia, like their mutual love of food, which is mentioned at various times. But then again, who doesn't love food? :)
That scene with the eyes, and then James. It was perfect. I really like how you throw in at least one scene like that per chapter, because it really keeps the reader's interest going. Oooh, and the blackmailing thing with James just made me laugh. It seems Thalia's an expert at embarrassing various Marauders.
The literature references: I love them. Especially because you keep using books I've read. Keep them going. :)
Overall, very good chapter. I couldn't really find much to CC.
Author's Response: Hello again, and thank you for another great review!
I'm glad that you liked the quidditch trials, I've never really read them from a spectator POV either, so I thought it would be fun to do! Yes Thalia and Sirius' banter is more light hearted, and they gradually becoming more friendly with one another.
Got to love foreshadowing you're the first person to pick it out actually, so yay!
I try and not be mean to Peter, but I just can't help it, because I remember what he does. I do make attempts later on for him to be nice!
Yes I thought it would be fun to have George as the nicer quidditch captain!
Thalia is rather deep, and she tends to brood a lot about her Mother in the later chapters, as she begins to affect her more.
I'm glad that you liked the scene with the eyes, and I have to throw one in, otherwise the readers wouldn't be too happy, and they're so much fun to write ;D Haha yes Thalia can blackmail the Marauders very well.
Yes the books I mention are actually the ones I have read so yay!
Thank you for another great review,