Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:ShadowRose says:
ShadowRose again! Wow, that was a long time gap between reviews...

I like how this chapter starts in the same place the last one did: on the platform. It kind of shows how everything has changed, but at the same time, nothing has changed at all.

I can't really comment on Thalia's characterization yet, because I feel like we haven't fully gotten to know her yet. But so far, I like where you're going with it.

The run-in scene is cute. Some people (actually, a lot of reviewers I've encountered) would call that out as cliché, but personally, I really like it. I mean, hey, it's used often for a reason. People run into each other a lot. :)

Their banter is funny too. I can see how their relationship is similar to that of James and Lily (minus the constant asking-out.

Sirius's characterization, in my opinion, is spot-on. He's snarky (I seriously love that word... okay, side-note over) and a bit of a play-boy, which is exactly how I have always pictured him.

Lily's characterization is perfect too. Too many stories try to make her something she isn't, but you really captured her for who she is: a sweet and smart girl who cares about the rules.

The English word nerd in me loves the use of the word "insipid." Just thought I'd throw that out.

I like how you made comments about the ongoing war, but didn't make it the main topic of conversation either. I feel like too many stories lean to one extreme or the other, so I like the balance I see here. :)

Overall, great chapter, and this story looks really promising!

-ShadowRose

Author's Response: Hello there again! Don't worry about how long it takes, I'm just grateful that you're taking the time to do them :')

I'm glad that you liked how I started it, it just seemed like the best place, it was only until later that I realised that the prologue started there as well! Who cares about cliches, they're cliches because they work well :P I'm glad that you found it cute!

Yes their relationship is sort of similar to James and Lily's, but they become friends much quicker, and there's a lot less arguing!

Haha snarky is a cool word! I'm glad that you liked his characterisation, as he's such a hard person to write in my opinion!

Yes I get annoyed but some of the depictions of Lily too, so I'm glad that you liked her here! Insipid is a cool word, and don't worry I have a word of the day, so yay for English word nerds!

I'm glad that you liked the comments about the war, as it seemed natural to include them, but they're teenagers so they're not going to care too much about it!

Thanks again for another wonderful review!

-Kiana :D


Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Submit Report:  





All stories remain the property of their authors and must not be copied in any form without their consent. This is an unofficial, not for profit site, and is in no way connected with J.K. Rowling, Scholastic Books or Bloomsbury Publishing or Warner Bros. It is not endorsed by any of the aforementioned parties. Rights to characters and their images is neither claimed nor implied. The use of photographs and/or the likeness of any person contained herein does not imply endorsement of any kind. Any depictions were obtained through publically available sources and therefore fall under fair use. Although we may provide links to other websites, we are not responsible for any material at these sites. You acknowledge that you link to these other websites at your own risk. All original administrative content is copyright of the site owner and must not be copied in any form (electronic or otherwise) without the prior consent of the siteowner. ©2000-2012 Fanfictionworld.net

[terms of service] [report abuse] [privacy policy] [site credits]
 
 

navigation

home

search HPFF
read stories
write stories
login/register
get help
site links
forums
podcasts
Terms of Service
Site Rules
contact us

 
 
 

categories & genres

Genre:
- crossover
- drama
- fluff
- general
- horror/dark
- humor
- mystery
- romance
- action/adventure
- angst
- au
- young adult

Popular Pairings:
- harry/ginny
- ron/hermione
- james/lily
- draco/hermione
- more...

Format:
- one-shot
- short story
- novella
- novel
- short story collection
- songfic

 
 
 

quick links

my account
ToS
random story
site rules
help
merchandise


 
 
 

fanfictionworld.net