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Review:Hogwarts27 says:
Hi, I just happened to find your story, and just finished reading all the posted chapters (through 9), and have really enjoyed it so far. I like a good Snape fic, even when he's portrayed as 'softer', as long as he's kept in charcter. I'll also say that I think you're a very talented writer, and I really like your writing style. It's very engaging, and your descriptions are vivid without being overdone. The pace and flow of the story is also good. It moves along nicely. You did a good job portraying Snape's thoughts in this chapter, which really drew me in. I think you've got his dialogue pretty well in character too, for a 'softer' Snape. I also liked the way you had Lily greet Snape beyond the veil.

I don't think you got McGonagall's dialogue exactly in character, but I didn't let a little thing like that bother me.

One small thing I might point out, and this is not to criticize, but just to mention - was that you suggested James was partially to blame for Snape aligning himself with the Death Eaters, while in Canon I never got the feeling that James had anything to do it. Snape was already firmly aligned with his Death Eater friends before James even entered the picture, and even the possibility of losing Lily's friendship wasn't enough to make him consider breaking ties with his dark friends. I also heard JKR say in an interview that Snape sided with his Death Eater friends in his youth because he wrongly thought power would get him respect, Lily's respect in particular, but later came to realize he was wrong, so it wasn't James at all who pushed Snape in the wrong direction. It was just Snape's own wrong thinking. That said, the books made it clear that Snape came to regret his choices when Lily was killed, and it's always good when a character owns up to their mistakes, which I know Snape does later in this story, and I enjoyed reading how you portrayed that shift in him.

Author's Response: Thanks for reading and reviewing!

I definitely understand the things that you pointed out about James and Snape. I know that Snape joined the Death Eaters for power and control, and was already on the verge of joining before Lily & James got together. I guess what I was going for was that the bullying and teasing that he had endured not only from James, but also his father and everyone else that ever made fun of him had driven him to the need for power over others. (If that makes any sense.)

Anyways...thanks for reading and I hope you continue to do so!


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