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Review:ShadowRose says:
I saw this one-shot, and I knew before I even started that I'd be crying by the end. Well, I was right.

You did an excellent job portraying Ginny as a mother, and capturing the thoughts of a parent whose child has committed suicide - more specifically, capturing the blame she places on herself. "It was my job to protect my children and I failed." This line was truly heartbreaking. It just captures the essence of a grieving parent perfectly.

That repetition. It's perfect. "Lovely Lily." Every time it was written, it just pulled the whole thing together.

I love Albus's character as well. He's not like Ginny in that she at least is familiar with death. Instead, the concept is entirely foreign to him, as he confesses " 'I can't say goodbye, I don't know how.' " His unfamiliarity provides the perfect foil to Harry, who is the strong one of the family, the one that is already familiar with this suffering.

I love the wedding/funeral juxtaposition. It really creates that sense of missed opportunity, and it's just... it works.

I just have one teensy little piece of constructive criticism. When you say "I took a deep breathe," the word should be breath, without the "e." If you add the "e," the word becomes a verb, and no longer makes sense. Sorry, the little grammar lover in my head just had to point that little thing out. Other than that, it was very well constructed.

Best line of the entire one shot: "Third time lucky, I guess." It sounds like a strange line to pick out, but it jumped off the page at me. I think it's the "I guess" part. Ginny recognizes she was lucky to have Lily, and probably heard it a thousand times, but now she knows she's not so lucky anymore, saying she lost her "little lucky charm." You may not have even meant that to stand out the way I saw it, but I just thought it was an absolutely gorgeous little phrase.

This was a really great one-shot, and it did a great job of capturing all the emotions of the scene in such a short time frame.

-ShadowRose

Author's Response: Sorry I took so long to reply, I've have literally been fan girling over this review. Thank you!!

I wasn't too sure of Albus' character but your review made me love him a bit more.

Grammar/spelling = so not my strong point so thanks for pointing that out. I'll be sure to change it :)

I never thought about that line, like that before but now you've mentioned it I see what you mean :D

Thank you once again for reviewing!!
-Potterfan310
Soph xx


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