Hello there! I like the idea behind this story a lot :D I don't read enough about quidditch on here, so this was very intriguing to me.
The descriptions of setting was just brilliant. I could image the old stadium in all of it's anti-grandness.
The character introduction was great. You introduced just enough to let me know who your characters are, but not enough for me to guess their whole story within the first chapter. All of this being said, my favourite character is Ritchie :) There's just something about short, balding men that makes me giggle like a teenage girl.
My favourite part of this story (that made me laugh really hard):
"Hello, my name is Oliver Wood, I am your new manager," I finished with flair, deciding to strike the pose that Dumbledore had favoured when welcoming students to Hogwarts (epic visual imagery here). Arms spread wide, as if I was about to hug someone, and a big smile plastered across my face. They all just gawped at me, not blinking. I dropped my hands, but kept my smile intact.
Okay, so other things I like about your writing style:
1-The air of mystery you have throughout the plot. I mentioned this earlier, but Oliver doesn't give his whole background story. This is unique! We have to figure it out like the rest of the team, and I just love that.
2-Narration was very smooth, keeping the flow of the chapter to a good pace.
3-Your humour is subtle and does not rely on dialogue :D
Awesome! I really enjoy this story! I don't have any writing style criticism, but I did notice some minor grammar problems. You had quite a few run-on, or fused, sentences. This is better than the fragmented sentences that I normally read on here. I wouldn't worry too much about it, because it doesn't take away from the awesomeness that is this story.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for reviewing this!
Yes, the stadium is rather. . .er. . basic to say the least. And I'm glad you liked the introductions of all the characters, as I didn't want it to end up like 'This is Mary, she is 5'5 ,has blue eyes, blonde hair, enjoys soup'
And Ritchie, I secretly think he's one of my favourites too :)
Ah yes, Dumbledores signature pose! I had to include it, I always loved it when he did it in the books so I was just like 'Intro! We are using it!' my plot bunny tried to stop me, but I didn't listen. . .poor Mario. . .
I'm glad you thought the plot flowed well, as this was a concern of mine!
And I'm glad you thought it was funny, this is good, very good :)
Back at you, bravo on your review :D