It was nice to see Lily doing some school work, as so many stories seem to forget that they are at school, so it’s nice to see that you’ve remembered ;D I liked the details about the work of a healer, as it was interesting to see what their work may possibly include, as it’s always great to see what a magical alternative to a muggle job may be.
I’m more like Lily than Harry and James when it comes to school work, so of course I could understand her annoyance at being interrupted. She seemed really interested in the health related potions though, is this a hint she wants to be a healer? If so that’s awesome, as in my head canon she’s a healer, as she just seems to be natural at it.
Aw it’s so sweet to see James growing up! Becoming head boy, quidditch captain, and now being able to be friends with Lily!
You seem to write the banter between the Marauders very well, which is great as that’s one of my favourite parts of all the Marauders books. You also showed that they’re all equal in the friendship, and that’s there’s no superior ones, which is what it’s meant to be like, and that was just lovely.
I had wondered why Belle was called that, as it’s a rather unusual name, but it makes sense now as she’s French. I liked the idea of Adeline marrying a French duke as it was nice to tie magic into muggle royalty. You can ignore this point, as it’s just me being a history nerd, but I thought that France got rid of all the titled class after the revolution which was in the 1700s? Or maybe it’s like the Greek royal family, and they just kept the titles anyway? She a mystery life in France though! I can’t wait to find out more about it.
I could sense a brief amount of flirting going on between Belle and Sirius, how exciting! Also I love Alice and Frank they just seem great, and I love that Frank had some spunk about him!
I really liked the flashback, as it meant we could learn more about Lily’s family dynamics, and you could sense that Petunia was always a little inferior then, with her not being invited to the tea party. N’aw Lily was cute, with her not being able to say Ireland, I hope we get more flashbacks soon!
The idea of splitting up the paragraphs with a line is a great, as it sort of warns you mentally that the next paragraph/section will be about something else, so you’re not shocked.
When Remus grabbed Lily, I thought he was going to kiss her then. But I’m glad that he didn’t, as no one should mess with Jilly, as they’re up there with Romeo and Juliet on couple cuteness. The Prospects sound interesting though, and Regulus Black was there, which is great, as I love him!
I like the idea of Alrek it’s interesting to have all these foreign students at Hogwarts as it adds something special to it. Aw poor James though, getting all jealous about a guy talking to Lily!
A great chapter, and I should be back soon:D
Author's Response: I'Ã‚Â€Ã‚Â™m working backwards with your responses, I hope you donÃƒÂ¢Ã‚Â€Ã‚Â™t mind!
First of all, thank you so SO much for all your lovely attention on Before They Fall ♥ You'Ã‚Â€Ã‚Â™ve just made my week. And it's a Monday. ItÃƒÂ¢Ã‚Â€Ã‚Â™s hard to put me in a good mood on a Monday :P
I have a lot of fun exploring school work with this story. There'Ã‚Â€Ã‚Â™s a chapter later down the road, 17 I think, that is almost entirely about classes. I got a bit carried away on that one :P I'm more like James, as in I'Ã‚Â€Ã‚Â™ll take any distraction I can get from work :P hahha. And yes, though she isn'Ã‚Â€Ã‚Â™t sure of it right now, she later on decides that she is interested in becoming a healer! I think it it works really well for her character, and I'm so happy it meshes with your head canon!
I LOVE Marauders banter, or just really writing them all together in general. That was always one thing I felt like I got shorted on when reading J/L fan fictions, so I try to really make this story involve their friendship as much as relationships. I'Ã‚Â€Ã‚Â™m so happy you like it so far ♥
Really? I had no idea about that! I assumed that, because the UK still uses the title, France would too. oops! Thanks for noticing that! It actually doesn't become an important part of the story or anything, so maybe I'Ã‚Â€Ã‚Â™ll change it. I just need to figure out a different term to make it clear that he'Ã‚Â€Ã‚Â™s a well known/respected French men... hmm.. I'Ã‚Â€Ã‚Â™ll go play with google later :P
She did have a mystery life in France! You get more clues in chapter 7, then the whole story comes out in a later chapter :) 13 maybe?
Heheh I thought Little Lily was cute too!! Yes! Flashbacks are a recurring theme through this, they lessen as Lily starts not thinking about her family as much, but I use them to show a bit of what happened between her and Petunia up until the lovely Christmas meeting with her and Vernon!
No Remus! I can promise that I never will, in this story or any other, write Lily and James as anything but those two. You'Ã‚Â€Ã‚Â™re right, no one should mess with Jily :P
I'm happy the Prospects interested you! We do get looks into the 'dark side'Ã‚Â€Ã‚Â™ of the war from DE prospective, the first is actually next chapter, so I hope you like those!!
I'Ã‚Â€Ã‚Â™m so happy you like this chapter! I know these first few include a bit of cliches, but they'Ã‚Â€Ã‚Â™re pretty much over at this point. In my opinion, chapter 5 is the one that sort of starts giving the story a bit more life, so I'Ã‚Â€Ã‚Â™m really excited to see what you think about that one!
Thank you so much for stopping by, m'Ã‚Â€Ã‚Â™dear ♥