Hi Gabbie! Iím here with you review!
Is it bad to say that Iím kind of relieved that weíve moved on from the Malfoy party. While it was great, I felt if there was another chapter there, it would have dragged on, and Iím also intrigued to see what kind of action happens at Zabiniís Manor!
I found Astoriaís thoughts about Blaise really adorable. You can tell that sheís starting to like him, but she doesnít want to admit it! I love this part of the relationship, as itís just so sweet to see one of them fall for the other. Also the way heís portrayed in Astoriaís mind, how could you not fall for him?
Then that whole scene when Astoria reveals that she ran away. Then Blaise touched her face, it was such an awing moment, and really well done. I just want them to get closer, as they would be so cute together. Iím waiting for that moment in anticipation so I hope that it happens soon!
I like how you keep on dropping hints at her fatherís job and family. Though we know that he is some sort of assassin, and bad things have happened to his relatives, we still donít know the details of it all. We also donít know why the Greengrasses are in such a bad financial state, and I canít wait to find out why. I think itís really good that youíve developed a sense of mystery, and tension surrounding these events.
I like how Blaiseís character is developing, and weíre getting a sense of who he is now. I think his dry sense of humour is great, and itís nice to have some comedy, in an otherwise dark story. Also the fact that he has a sibling is surprising, as I just imagined him to be an only child. I could sense there was tension in their relationship though, and it will be nice to see how thatís developed.
I thought this was an interesting chapter, and we got to know a lot more about Blaise and Astoria which was really nice, as I like to have a backstory to characters, as it feels as if we know them better that way! I think the only CC I can give is use more periods and breaks, but I can understand with a chapter this long, itís a pain to proof read!
Author's Response: Hello!
Hey there, thanks for coming back. I had gotten tired of writing the Malfoy's and the party myself but I hadn't gotten what I wanted in my earlier drafts which was why it took so long to get OUT of it. Hahhaa. But anyway, its always fun talking about Zabini and his life, eh? :)
I think you're going to be getting a feel for the way Astoria sees Blaise the more you go on in this story. With the way I write him, i just sort of turn into goo because, honestly, he's fantastic! :D
Bwhaha, they might have some trouble getting together, to be honest. But you'll see what I mean if you keep on reading! :D
I don't think you really get a grasp of the full Greengrass family and their secrets until waaay into the story. I never quite fully say what they do and why because I haven't gotten to that point but its fun guessing, right? :D
Blaise is a great character to write for, hard on some things but really fun! He's got so many layers and depth to him that you're never sure what he means or what he's trying to say. Hahahah. Or something.
Oh, yes, he has an older sister but while she's mentioned right now, you don't get the full scale of her evil until much later. :D
You shall get more Blastoria action later on (See how I shipped their names?!) and more backstory and such. This was a really long chapter but I haven't gotten to edit and such cause it sucks and its boring. And I've got other stuff to do. Hahahhaha.