Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:MissMdsty says:
Hello there! I'm here with your requested review!

In your form you wanted to know if this was boring. Well my dear, this was anything but boring. I can honestly say it's one of the most original ideas I have ever come across.

In regards to the story, I found the beginning a big confusing. I understood that somebody was about to be married, at the Burrow and to a Potter. Then the flashbacks started and it took me a few minutes to finally understand what was really going on. Maybe it would help if you didn't call the OCs by their nicknames, so we would be able to follow the story better (instead of having the character refer to her sister as Vi, call her Violet).

It's going to be interesting to learn how James II took the news and how he willingly offered to marry this girl. I'm also quite curious as to who the triplets' parents are. Maybe Daphne Greengrass?

This first chapter set up the mood perfectly for what you described (very appropriately) as a rollercoaster. You have a lot of OCs that I'm curious how you will develop and how you will incorporate all of these different characters in the story.

One comment I want to make is the use of comas. Sometimes, I found it hard to follow a sentence because the comas were missing. It's nothing very big and a beta or an editor could help with it!

Author's Response: Hey! Thank you for doing this =)

I am glad you didn't find it boring. Ohh yah? I will try to fix the confusing part. It is explained in chp 3 which will be up soon so maybe that will help.

haha thats a good guess but I can't give it away :P

Thank you! I'll proofread the story to see where the problems might be haha

Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Submit Report:  





All stories remain the property of their authors and must not be copied in any form without their consent. This is an unofficial, not for profit site, and is in no way connected with J.K. Rowling, Scholastic Books or Bloomsbury Publishing or Warner Bros. It is not endorsed by any of the aforementioned parties. Rights to characters and their images is neither claimed nor implied. The use of photographs and/or the likeness of any person contained herein does not imply endorsement of any kind. Any depictions were obtained through publically available sources and therefore fall under fair use. Although we may provide links to other websites, we are not responsible for any material at these sites. You acknowledge that you link to these other websites at your own risk. All original administrative content is copyright of the site owner and must not be copied in any form (electronic or otherwise) without the prior consent of the siteowner. ©2000-2012 Fanfictionworld.net

[terms of service] [report abuse] [privacy policy] [site credits]
 
 

navigation

home

search HPFF
read stories
write stories
login/register
get help
site links
forums
podcasts
Terms of Service
Site Rules
contact us

  
 
 

categories & genres

Genre:
- crossover
- drama
- fluff
- general
- horror/dark
- humor
- mystery
- romance
- action/adventure
- angst
- au
- young adult

Popular Pairings:
- harry/ginny
- ron/hermione
- james/lily
- draco/hermione
- more...

Format:
- one-shot
- short story
- novella
- novel
- short story collection
- songfic

  
 
 

quick links

my account
ToS
random story
site rules
help
merchandise


  
 
 

fanfictionworld.net