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Review:AlexFan says:
Alrighty, so, I'm here with your review and just to start off, I really enjoyed this first chapter.

There are some small grammar mistakes at the beginning of the chapter and the only reason that I noticed them to be perfectly honest is because I have a tendency to zero in on the things that aren't right in a story.

Personally, I thought the story flowed really well. I didn't even notice I was finished the chapter until I got to the very bottom of the page and then I was like "wow, I didn't even notice I'd finished reading".

I always thought that Puddlemere United was one of the best teams and had the best of everything but obviously a lot can change in a few years. They practically sound broke now. I wonder if Oliver is going to do any renovations since he seems to own "half of Diagon Alley".

It was at the part where the team started practice that I really noticed the Oliver Wood coming out in Oliver. I couldn't help but smile when he was criticizing the team and how well they played. You did an especially good job on that part so well done.

This sounds like a real challenge for Oliver. Train an entire team that apparently can't play for nothing and it looks like he might have to pay for equipment if I were to go by the old stuff that the team has.

I don't know all of your characters but so far I really like them. Ritchie is one of my favourites because he's just so darn funny (or, at least he is to me) and I already love Oliver.

I'd say you did a pretty awesome job on this!

Author's Response: Awh! Thank you so much for such a nice review! :D

I will definitely go back and fix those mistakes! Thank you for pointing them out to me! :D

I'm glad you thought it flowed well, as I felt it could get a bit jerky at times, so thats nice to know!

Technically Oliver does own half of Diagon Alley, but is having a spot of money trouble, so I highly doubt he'd be able to afford to fix the entire club up! Ah well!

Oh! I'm so glad you said this! Because sometimes when your reading ff, a canon character has gone through this personality transplant and they are completely different to the way they acted in the books! So I'm glad you liked this!

Ritchie is just a pet, and I'm glad your finding him humorous! I definitely have a soft spot for him :D

Thank you so much for such a nice review :D


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