Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:patronus_charm says:
Hey it's patronus_charm with your review!

I'm so glad that you put the time frame in, I know it may sound like a minor thing, but so many author forget to do that, so the readers left feeling confused about when it's set, so all I can say is thank you for including it!

It was funny seeing how Charlie managed in the muggle world, I can see why he would find it bemusing that you needed a passport to travel, but I guess wizards don't really have such a high risk of terrorism, or identity theft ;)

I liked Charlie's reflective observations of the world and his surroundings, however I do feel there could be a little dialogue just to break it up a little, as sometimes there was just so much great description you couldn't take it all in, so it lost some of its power.

I loved the way Charlie was so mesmerised by Liz, as it was funny to see that from guy who previously spent most of his time with dragons. I noticed that she had the same eyes as Lily, what is with them and making guys fall in love with you?

I loved that little scene between the two, it was just so awkward as they both seemed nervous, it was just so funny and sweet to read, as you could tell that they were both interested in one another.

Overall I thought it was another great chapter and Charlie's characterisation is getting better and better, and you're starting to feel you really know him now, as he's not grieving as much now! Keep up the great work, Kiana :D

Author's Response: Hello again, Kiana!

Once again, thank you SO much for getting to this so quickly! I really do LOVE your reviews!! ♥

I'm really glad that you mentioned the timeline... in one of my other stories I didn't pay quite as much attention to detail, and it was pretty easy for things to fall apart from there. And by "Fall apart" I mean that I forgot that I had written something in a previous chapter that didn't chronologically match up with what was in the next chapter. So with this story I tried to pay a lot of attention to detail and keep things as close to Canon as possible, and it's nice to know that it was appreciated!!

Haha! I thought adding Charlie's confusion about Muggle artifacts would be a nice touch, so I'm glad you did, too!

Thank you for your comment about the need for dialogue to break up the description. You're right, there's definitely a whole lot of description here and not much dialogue to give the reader a break, so when I get a chance I'll try to find a way to go back and fix that! Thank you so much for the suggestion, and for pointing that out!!

I really like seeing Charlie in a romantic setting instead of a dangerous setting, too. I know I may be a little biased, though! :P And I actually did think of Lily very briefly when I decided to give Liz green eyes, so it's funny that you mentioned that there! :D

I've really come to love that little awkward-nervous scene between the two of them as well; it was really fun to write!!

I'm really glad you enjoyed the chapter, dear! And again, Thank you SO MUCH!

Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 787
Submit Report: