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Review:ChaosWednesday says:
Hey, it's Whiskey!

When I read that this was going to be crime-solving fic, I experienced some reservation, but turned out t be pleasantly surprised!

What I like best, I think, is the way you skip from scene to scene, avoiding any unnecessary filler moments or getting carried away with exposition. Instead, you sort of let you characters do that for you. It's good show-instead-of-tell work!

I think my favourite part was in the kitchen, when they discuss the case. You had many characters, but it never got confusing. Also, a gripping feeling of secrecy and uncertainty was well conveyed through the way Dunmore behaved and talked.

If there is anything I can offer in terms of CC, it would be that you look over the very first section. I was very shocked to see that Teddy gets Avada-ed and only then realized how serious that section actually was. Something about the way they talked to eachotehr implied more of an action-adventure scene. I expected them to jump off and run away together, proceeding to fight The Man and clear Teddy's name. I suppose there was a lot of hope in the section until the very end and not much about the way either of the characters acted implied the gravity of how they knew what was going to happen. I don't know how exactly you could adjust it, but maybe insert some more of Victoire's perspective, show how torn she must feel. Maybe draw some more attention to the threatening presence of the wand (you know, similar to the rule that if there is a gun in the first act, it WILL be used in the 3rd). I'm sure you cna think of something!

Well, I hope this was helpful. Thanks for the swap :)

Author's Response: Thanks a lot! I'll try to work on that first scene!

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