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Review:adluvshp says:
Here for your requested review!

I quite liked this chapter too. I liked how Draco seemed to have developed. Astoria and Narcissa were quite annoying indeed.

Coming to your concerns, I'll address them one by one briefly.

Flow - I think this story flowed quite well. The chapter was smooth and the narrative was over all easy to read as it flowed properly. Your transition from one scene to another was nicely done too.

Characters - As I said already, Draco as a character seems to have developed, and I quite liked him. His reflections and thoughts in this chapter were well-written and added to his character. As for Narcissa, she does seem very much like I'd think her to be, pestering Draco and all. You seem to get them both quite well.

As for Teddy and Andromeda being there, I think it is very believable. Andromeda seems like a friendly person and I dont think she'd pass up a chance to reconcile so its good that you showed that she reconciled with her sister after the war. Teddy's incorporation was nicely done too, and he was quite sweet.

The plot over all seems neat and I like it so far. The pace of the plot is balanced too.

Your grammar however was a little off in places, especially with the commas, and sometimes your phrases. I suggest asking your beta to look into that a little more deeply.

Apart from that, this made for a fine read!

Cheers!
AD
(AditiDraco95)

Author's Response: Hi, thanks for such a quick response!

I'm glad that you liked this chapter, and you found Astoria and Narcissa annoying - as that was my aim. I'm glad that you found no major issues flow/character/plot wise, it's always nice to know. Yeah I know there was a few grammar issues, as my beta couldn't look it over throughly as she was really busy, however I'll make sure they are straightened out, and hopefully they won't happen again (knowing me and my terrible grammar, they will though.) Thanks again for the review!


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