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Review:The Misfit says:
Hi Erica! I'm here for the review swap! I really like the way you've portrayed Pansy - it's very rare to see her written as a vulnerable and insecure character, so it's incredibly refreshing to see that your interpretation of her is different from what we see in the books - I think some authors forget Harry's view of the Slytherin was flawed in the books, so it's nice to see that you've written them very realistically - even making Pansy have the very flaw that she criticizes Millicent for. XD

This chapter has a very Gossip Girl feel to it, and I have to admit that I'm liking the drama! It's certainly a fresh breath of air compared to the angst that surrounds Hogwarts-era fics. :D

I'd advise you, however, to create some more visual imagery. This chapter has a lot of dialogue and while that's fine, it would be nice to read some more about their surroundings and how people look. I know everyone knows how Draco looks, but what about Daphne? Tracey? Et cetera. I think it would really improve the story. :)

I also noticed that Millicent referred to her boyfriend as "Crabbe" - if they're dating, shouldn't she call him Vincent? I also noticed a slight overlap between your two Saturday Pansy POVs - I'd suggest that you re-read those sections and try and get them to mesh together a little more. Feel free to PM me if you'd me to explain this in more detail. :)

I really like this chapter and I think with a little more editing, it could be really good! You've got a fantastic idea and you're doing really well with portraying teenage Slytherins - this is definitely a very good story! XD

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