|Review:||800 words of heaven says:|
Considering that you've reviewed my Sirius/OC story, it should be quite obvious how much I just adore Sirius and all his Hogwarts antics, so I'm pretty chuffed to read this!
I thought it really interesting how you wrote the prologue in third person and used the past tense, whereas with this chapter, it's in the first person and present tense. I think that created a really cool juxtoposition between the two chapters, really highlighting the difference between the two times. The past tense for the prologue was obviously to highlight that it was the past, but in addition to the change in person, it really highlighted to me how removed their first day on the Hogwarts Express was from now, but because you opened the first chapter in the same setting, it still showed that that day was still resonant in both their lives.
I liked Thalia's description of Sirius. Describing him as James' "loyal sidekick" seemed to me as if Thalia almost thought of Sirius as inferior to James' and not as partners in crime. Was that intentional or just Thalia being derisive? Also, describing his efforts to get Jily to be a thing as hindering rather than helping makes Sirius out to be uncharacteristically ditzy, which is quite endearing (and don't worry, Sirius - the entire Jily fandom is with you!).
When Thalia crashed into the two boys, all I could think was, "Ooh! Tension!" Thalia's hate for Sirius seems pretty intense - is there a particular reason for that, or is it just because? And why didn't she want to be noticed by the Marauders when she was heading towards her friends' compartment? Also, the way Lily was berating Thalia seemed to imply that Thalia gets into lots of fights with lots of people. Is that just me, or is that a thing? And is that something that she has in common with Sirius?
This was a really good introduction chapter! Just another thing concerning Maia. Aww! The Beauty falls in love with the Beast? Potential for lots of adorbs...
Author's Response: Hey! Thank your for this lovely review. Yeah for the prologue I didn't want to concentrate on one character, so I thought it was best to write in the 3rd person, and the past tense, because it was set 5 years before the main story begins, and it would give a sense that time had passed! Well starting on the Hogwarts Express, just seemed like the most natural place to start as it's the start of the story a start of a new year seemed the most logical point.
I guess with the sidekick thing, Thalia has more of a reason to dislike, Sirius as he's trying to get Jily together, whereas Thalia is supporting Lily in not getting them together!
I guess with her crashing into the boys, the reason she seems to hate Sirius, was because she was worried about what it seemed like to other people. I don't think she hates him, as that's quite severe, it's more of a dislike due to not knowing him properly! And with not wanting to be seen by the Marauders I guess it was because she didn't want anything to happen like it happened on the platform. Hmm, the thing about Thalia getting into fights, I think she's more into sticking up for her friends, and doing it for a purpose the irrationally like Sirius.
I like the idea about Maia, and yeah I can't wait for her and Remus to get together as well! Thank you for this lovely review, it helped loads! Kiana :D