|Review:||teh tarik says:|
Dean seems upset? Eh, why is that? What? Am I missing something? Does Dean like Edie? Am I misinterpreting things? Should I go back to the previous chapters and read every Dean scene in there? And...why is Seamus being surprisingly quiet? Does he and Dean know something Edie doesn't? THERE'S SOMETHING YOU'RE NOT TELLING ME. Ooh, those last few lines...I didn't catch on them when I first read this chapter a few days ago...but now on rereading...hmmm...you're planning something, aren't you, Sarah?! Am not going to be such a horribly imperceptive reader this time bahaha!
This may be one of my favourite chapters yet. SO MUCH WIN for Edie. And then not so much.
Love how you've brought in almost all the characters in here - Lisa and Justin in the first part, Rose in the second, and of course, of course, Seamus and Dean in the lovely last segment. Er...and Oliver, of course, though he's a bit overshadowed by the others, namely Seamus and Dean and Rose. And his fangirls as well. Not really sure how to explain clearly, but this chapter's just so full of energy and snark and wit. It just feels great to me. Not to mention all the lovely details here and there - Edie's smoking habit, and the fact that she buys her fags from a shop called Ashe and Plume (great shop name - did you make this up? it's brilliant!!), the compact mirror functioning as a two-way (wizarding technology!?!) and then of course, Seamus popping in from the other side while she's applying lipstick. And...Rose reading those books of "gratuitous smut" posing as detective fiction :D
And then there are moments when Edie pauses and notices her surroundings and we get out of Edie's head a little bit e.g.
The sun is beginning to set and passers-by are pulling their scarves or coats tighter around themselves against the chill. Itís amazing how just ten years ago you couldnít walk these streets alone, and now I prefer to stroll to work (when Iím not running horribly late). How things have changed.
I'm assuming you're referring to the Wizarding War here, and it's a very lovely allusion - sort of remembers canon a little, and gives a sense, albeit a very brief sense of setting and history. And there's just that bit of continuity from canon with this moment. Yeah, not sure if that made sense and all...
I think you've really shown us a lot more about Seamus and Dean's characterisations in that final part, especially Seamus. The way Edie describes him really adds depth and shows a new facet to their bro-lationship, and it's not just all blundering around getting sloshed and everything. And of course, those final lines which I still can't get over. That very slight shift in...something! If you blink you might just miss them! Because Seamus does put things back to normal with his "yeah she does have a huge rack" and all xD
Ooh, anyway, you know by now that I LOVED this chapter. It's really fun and hilarious and all but it's also quite complex and I enjoyed this heaps! NOW. Dean's the dude I got to watch out for. And I can't wait for Edie's next two interviews!
Great work as always!
Author's Response: ERMAGERD YOUR REVIEWS. I will never stop squeeing when I see a giant chunk o' my browser taken up by your lovely and helpful words! I cannot believe you have read and re-read this story! DO YOU KNOW HOW FLATTERING THAT IS DO YOU
Well, I won't say you're being entirely imperceptive if you think there's something going on, but that's all you get! For now. ;3
Good point that Oliver seems overshadowed. Sometimes I'm so afraid of getting his character wrong or having him act OOC from how he is in my head, that I just shy away from actually giving him a larger role. OBVIOUSLY this cannot keep happening, and starting in the next chapter you see more of him. But I think that's really good advice and now I want to go back and give him more of a presence in this chapter!
Yes, I did make up Ashe and Plume, although I credit JKR for making up names like Flourish and Blotts to get the wheels turning ;D
I decided to mention the Wizarding War because I really wanted to put a positive light on rebuilding a society, rather than post-war angst (although that is so fun to read!) But I felt like I was acting as though it never happened, which of course just would not do.
I felt like I was being unfair to Seamus. He is based off of one of my very dear friends, who definitely likes to party hard, but he is one of the most reliable, considerate and duty-bound people I've ever met. So I really wanted the readers to know that Seamus cares about much more than a good time. Although he does love a good time indeed ;D
Thank you, thank you, thank you so much I just can't even express it. Your reviews are always so incredibly helpful and oftentimes make me realize something about my own writing that I hadn't. :'D