|Review:||The Misfit says:|
Hi! I'm here from the review tag thread! :)
The summary for this story intrigued me, and I'm really glad that I read this. Your portrayal of Fleur was just so beautiful - you really showed that despite her beauty, she is still intelligent and still someone who will fight for her family. You really highlighted how young she and everyone else is - especially Ginny - and yet showed how they've all been forced to grow up quickly because of the war.
I especially loved this line: "How did you become a thread in this tapestry of war?" ♥ It was just so poetic, which is really evident in this one-shot - the whole story just flows like water - seamlessly, without any disjointed moments or OOCness; Fleur is just beautifully characterized here.
I can't find the words to describe that scene where Fleur kills that Death Eater! It was just so cold of her - and yet at the same time, it wasn't, because of her focus on her family; they matter more than anything else to her, and that was so lovely to read. And the way the Aurors reacted when she told them about the dead man; again, you emphasized how people constantly judge Fleur by her looks, when she can kick ass - she is a Triwizard champion, after all!
I almost cried when I read the scene where Fleur decides that her own grief is lesser than the Weasleys' because Fred was her brother-in-law, but he was a part of the Weasleys' lives, and that was just so beautiful. When you included the moment when everyone looked surprised at Fleur for having fought in the battle, it reminded me of the moment in the books when Bill was bitten by Greyback, and the Weasleys thought that Fleur wouldn't love him any more because of his scars - Fleur proved them wrong with her courage and her ability to be strong, no matter what emotional torment she was feeling, and that scene was just so beautifully canon, describing Fleur's personality beautifully.
Additionally, the way you described Fleur and Ginny's interactions was so incredible. A year ago, Ginny couldn't stand Fleur, but to see them finally become sisters was so well-written, I had tears in my eyes because I could feel what they feel and that is a testament of your amazing skills as an author.
Greyback's characterization was also spot on - the way he behaved was just so like the Greyback in the books. I quite like the way that Fleur reacted to him - while it seems slightly unlikely for her to put herself in that position when her husband was right there, heartbroken, I understand that it was necessary for the challenge. :)
I must confess that I'm not normally a fan of second person narrative - I am insanely picky, but this was just so beautifully written that I felt as if I was Fleur, and you were guiding me through my memories of the Battle of Hogwarts. And this is your first time writing second person narrative? What?! That this is your first story using this type of narrative, and yet you've pulled it off so spectacularly, just blows my mind.
I only caught a couple of typos: "But you continue on down the crumbing staircase" - you didn't need to add "on", as "continue" is sufficient on its own. Also, crumbing is missing an "L". ;) In this sentence, "She knows, and your instantly thankful", "your" should actually be "you're". And "He sounds concerned, but not frighting. He knows youíve seen worse." - frightened?
This was a wonderful one-shot and I'm so glad that I've read it. I'd like to apologize for the delay it took me to review; I did start writing the review as soon as I posted in the review tag thread but halfway through, I had to make dinner (and then eat it) so this review is a little late - sorry! ♥
Author's Response: Hi m'dear! Sorry for taking ages to respond to this!
I have a huge pet peeve when people portray Fleur as this stupid, mean girl. No, she might not be the most welcoming person, and she might appear to be less intelligent because she is very pretty -- but she also was made a triwizard champion and she made herself sick worrying about her sister when during the Black Lake event. Then on top of that, she married a man whose family was probably one of the most wanted by an evil murderous wizard, stuck by him after he was disfigured, and continued to be supportive of fighting the war after her wedding day was destroyed. She's such an amazingly complex character to me, and I think a lot of people forget the details that JKR put in to show her good qualities, and focus on the things that the Weasley girls thought about her.
I really had fun playing with Fleur's more.. ruthless side, in this. I don't want you to almost cry... but still, I'm a bit happy that i made it emotional enough to pull at your feels when they talk about Fred's death. I was exhausted after writing this little one shot. After all the emotions I put Fleur through, I needed a nap :P
Ahhh thank you for your compliments on the second person narrative! ♥ I tried third and first both, and wanted to pull my eyes out. I was SO happy when I started working with second person and it actually began cooperating :P
You review has made my week ♥ thank you again for all your awesome compliments. And thank you for pointing out the typos!! That was awesome of you to actually tell me where they are. I'll get people that say, 'I noticed a few typos' but that's all. It isn't their job to proof read my story of course, but if I didn't catch the typos the first fifty times I read through, I'm clearly not going to catch them now. So yeah, it always makes me super happy when someone tells me the actual typo they noticed ♥
I'm so happy you enjoyed this ♥