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Review:Dominique2012 says:
I like your story so far but you should get a beta (I think that's what they are called) cause there are some mistakes and beta's usually help your story..become stronger? I guess you can say. You forgot to add question marks when someone asks a question. Just like to point it out so you can look over it and fix it. Also, you should add commas now and then so the sentences aren't too messy; for example: "Daddy, what's happening? Who is trying to hurt Harry?" And sometimes your sentences start with lower cases (Which it shouldn't since you should always capitalized your sentences) and needs to have periods at the end; I think that's all the mistakes; other then that, your story is good. Just need to go back and look it over. You should keep the beta idea in mind, it always a good idea and it would help you out with your story. Now onto the next chapter for me. (:

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