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Review:teh tarik says:
Hey there, I'm from the Review Tag :)

So the previous time I read Betrayal, and I'm so glad I get to read the other side of the story i.e. Dominique's perspective. And you've done a really marvellous job in portraying her character as well. She is just so...lively and wholesome and springy. These lines were particularly beautiful : Dom decided it was one of the best moments in her life, running madly through the rain, splashing water everywhere, with Teddy in tow. She felt like a free bird, soaring giddily in her freedom.

That kiss in the rain scene just make me go warm and gushy inside, even though everything was just going to culminate in tragedy. Sigh. As for Teddy, I do find him rather needy and somewhat selfish...the way he really wants Dom to stick around to just - be there for him, even though he will marry her sister. I felt more for Dom than him in this story :)

I would advise you to break up Teddy's big speech there; I know it's supposed to be an outburst of emotion or something, but I think that it could be broken down, and interspersed with narrative just to make the flow of the story better :)

Well, I've really enjoyed this story and its sequel. They are both such sad tragic pieces, and I think you've really captured the characters' emotional states well. Lovely.

-teh

Author's Response: Hey! Thanks for reading and reviewing!

I am glad you read this too, though it would have been much nicer if you'd read Ending It first and then Betrayal xP Its good to know that you found Dom portrayed well.

I put in special effort in the kiss-in-the-rain scene so I am glad you liked it. Teddy is quite needy and selfish yeah.

Thanks for the advice, I'll work on breaking it down :)

thank you for reading once again!


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