Hello, there, my special Santa's Helper! I really appreciated all of the awesome reviews you did for me during the Secret Santa. It took what was turning into quite a bummer and made it a special treat. :Hugs:
Anyway, before I read the first word, I'm really intrigued by the premise. I always feel a special loathing for Wormtail. So many people got hurt because of the sniveling, cowardly little rat. Let's see what you're going to do with him, shall we?
The scene in the destroyed cottage in Godric's Hollow was beautifully written. You did a great job of using the small details from Sirius's memories and contrasting them with the bleak devastation of the living room. The sadness comes through with such intensity, it was really gripping. I could almost feel my throat tightening up as I imagined Sirius was feeling the same way. Out of the entire place, he was able to salvage nothing more than the 2-way mirror. Terribly, terrbily sad. :(
You kept up your lovely, vivid descriptions as the scene moved from Godric's Hollow to Hogwarts. Theo Nott's pathetic attempt at vandalism was a nice little chuckle in the middle of an otherwise heavy chapter. I loved the way that Sirius judged him a rank amateur.
The way that you captured all of the sensory details of meandering through the Halloween feast the way that a dog would actually experience them was brilliant. Everything was about smells and tastes.
The chase to catch Peter was exciting and gripping. I really wished that it was longer. I think it would have been amazing to bomb through the castle from Sirius's four-legged point of view, weaving behind statues and between students' legs, following Peter's tail. But, seeing as how I could only get about one sentence out of the idea in this review, maybe I just convinced myself that what you did was plenty. LOL
Grrr! Of all the lousy times for Peeves to interfere! OK, I guess the book would have been a lot shorter if he hadn't, but still... You did a good job capturing the frustration as well as giving a perfect explanation for why Sirius decided to tear up the Fat Lady's portrait. I did think it was a bit odd that she wasn't more fearful of him. She almost sounded as though she'd forgotten that he was a fugitive accused of betraying James and Lily and murdering Peter and 12 muggles.
I did love your ending. Even though Sirius failed to kill Peter, seeing Harry alive and healthy and happy gave him something positive to take away from his foray into the castle.
OK, so one nit-picky thing that bugged me. Feel free to ignore it if you like. The only Christmas that Harry would have spent with his parents -- wow, that's sad to write :( -- he would have been around six months old. Probably too young to mount a broom -- even a toy one -- or play with his father's wand. Like I said, nit-picky, but I wanted to point it out.
Also, I noticed one typo: "He sniffed the air and trotted to the Hagridís hut." Should just read "... trotted to Hagrid's hut."
This was a really fun read, even if it didn't end with Sirius tearing Peter limb from limb. Too bad, really. But that wouldn't be canon. So I guess scaring him out of his wits was a pretty good alternative. Great story and thanks again!
Author's Response: Hi! =) So sorry, it has taken so long to answer your reviews, really busy winter and whatnot. It was fun to read your stories, I should really get back to your page and finish reading & reviewing Marked. I'm glad I was able to help little around holidays, it was fun and everyone should get some prezzies after all. =)
The Godric's Hollow scene was really sad to write. I'm glad the pain I felt while writing it came across well. I pondered about writing longer chase scene, but then again the point was that no one realized how Sirius came to the castle, and that would have been bit harder to believe if many students had remembered seeing a large dog running around.
I don't think that when you're a painting, you'd fear too many things. Well, at least until someone starts to rip your portrait apart.
Hmm. I'm not sure where you got the Christmas? Chestnuts maybe? Here in Europe people tend to roast those as soon as weather turns colder. So I was definitely thinking about cool October weather rather than holiday season. Mugs of tea, friends, fire in the fireplace and chestnuts. =)
I believe it was in Lily's letter to Sirius (in DH), where she talked about how Harry was zooming around on his toy broom which he got for his first birthday. So around next Halloween (when his parents died) Harry would have been a year and three months old.
Thanks for spotting the typo, I'll fix it asap. Thank you for this lovely review. =)