Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:patronus_charm says:
Hey it's patronus_charm from the review tag!First review on your first story what an honour! ;D

I really liked how you used loads of describtion as it enabled me to really imagine Johanna perfectly which is a really important thing to do! The name Johanna is also a great one for the Potter universe I have to say is she by any chance related to Ernie Macmillan due to the same surname? I thought you gave a great introduction to the character as you made her intriguing, someone you want to learn more about her and her family situation.

I also felt you introduced James, Sirius and Lily really well and caught their key characteristics, Lily's kindness and James and Sirius's cheekiness and pranksterness (if that's a word!).

A couple of pointers for future chapters. I would suggest breaking up your paragraphs as they are rather long and some readers may lose concentration. I saw in your author note you weren't too great grammar and neither am I. I got a beta which really helps so you may want to think about that :)

Besides that it was a great start well done :D


Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 303
Submit Report: