Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:Hippothestrowl says:
The second half of this chapter draws more interest - more actual story. The leaf flutter charm is an inventive idea and the SPEW badge pin doubly strong because it impresses Hermione as well as being a useful, believable tool for the moment. The lockbox contents progress the story. I think that's the weakness elsewhere for me: slow-paced and lacking progression - too much routine background. Maybe I've read too many Potter fics but I think background story should be going on in the background as a 'given' while the real story, a focus of interest, continuously unfolds on top, eg, the lockbox opening is the story here, the tree house is background. So if this had only been a tea party in a tree house it would have been rather routine. I think I like the main young characters though - it feels like them.

Author's Response: Point taken.
It pleases me that the characters feel right to you, I am taking liberties with them of course so that they grow through the story, but hopefully this growth will feel natural.
I find myself anticipating your comments on the next chapter. It is admittedly background building in nature, but also foundational.
Thank you for all your time, reading and commenting.


Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 361
Submit Report: