Another good chapter. May be an inheritance too far? He's already got an inheritance from his parents and from Sirius that is incalculable. Plus there's the inheritance that's gone to the Dursleys. Now another inheritance to top the lot many times over by the sound of it. OTT. The only thing of interest might be any extra goodies; the money isn't story-interesting for me at this point so I wish his grandparents had been poor and just left him some exceptional magical gift, a personal item, a moving message, etc.
Good riddance to the Dursleys anyway. I loathe and despise them for the abuse and torture they have put Harry through for sixteen years and am unable to care much for Petunia even if she is having a change of heart (after sixteen years?) I'd be happy to see them thrown into a dungeon forever for child abuse. Instead, they are rewarded for their evil.
That said, it is perfectly acceptable and even laudable to write about any aspect or change in the Harry Potter story and this writing is above average and very good (apart from things I've mentioned before like adjective listing - I really don't care that one of these legal guys has blue eyes or what pants he's wearing.)
The problem is that no matter how well written, readers have different values and interests. So I love some of the chapters but others are mixed or soso not because they are bad but because they are not my kind of story. I hate shopping so a shopping trip is boring to me. Fashion is boring to me. I hate Petunia. I hate Draco. I'm not interested in giraffe diseases or chamber music or the wheat production of Kansas in the 19th century so I hope there are no chapters about those. That's how it is. ;)
What I am saying is that this is not a criticism. This story is in some ways one of the best-written fics I've read. It's what it is writing about that varies the interest and enjoyment for me. For anyone who loves good Draco, money, good Petunia, fashion, (Muggle) shopping trips, etc. this is perfect. Chapters 2 and 3 are probably my fav chapters so far.
I have this bookmarked so will keep reading - but it is competing with a lot of other stuff!
Author's Response: Thank you!
A very fair assessment. I completely understand. If I were writing this story for publication I would edit out tons of material, probably better than half because it feeds Fanon and not necessarily the plot. I have found that many, many fanfic readers really crave all the little details, because they want to know everything there is to know about Harry Potter and the world he lives in. So, I am knowingly guilty of creating a detailed and expanded Potterverse for this story to exist in, which as you know now includes things like juxtaposing Diagon Alley, in one chapter, with a Muggle shopping center in another. I can completely understand, particularly for the more discerning reader that this can become cumbersome. However, I would argue that the majority of readers I run in to here are simply soaking in the detail. If you were to read reviews I think you would see the same. It is a Fanfic and so it is admittedly indulgent. That said...
The money is not going to be the important aspect of Harry's further inheritance, Harry already does not care about money. And, you are past dealing with the Dursleys! there may be a reference to them later in the story, but you'll like it, I think.
Hmm... giraffe diseases, chamber music and 19th century Kansas wheat production... Maybe I'll work them in just as a nod to your beautifully illustrative list. (Just kidding!) Your point is well made and understood, and may actually inform some of the new chapters. I have long anticipated that once I get them back to Hogwarts the story would come much more into focus.
I do appreciate your high praise and I hope you will stick with the story, your observations are quite valuable.
Thanks again for reading and commenting, and as always, Happy Reading!