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Review:FredWeasleyIsMyKing says:
Hello, Just filling out your requested review :)

I thought this was a great little one-shot and to answer your concerns, it works perfectly fine as a one-shot! i wasn't confused or anything at all. I don't feel the need to read the prequel to understand this part but I must say you have me interested!!

I thought the plot was great - I love reading real life drama brought into the wizarding world and I felt this worked perfectly. To find out the day before her wedding though - man, you are harsh! My heart really went out to vic!

I really liked your characterisation too. You could pretty much take the three characters wherever you wanted due to having no real insight into them from the amazing JK and I loved what you did. These people clearly have flaws and two of them in particular have seriously messed up and given into temptation. The one bit of CC I would give you is to be careful with some of the speech. At times, I didn't always feel that the things they were saying were necessary. It was more like you were trying to get their feelings out but you could have done that in the description rather than in the speech if you understand me? It's just my opinion though and it doesn't take it away from being a great piece!

I didn't notice anything wrong grammar wise and I thought the flow was great. i loved the contrast between the love and hate vic clearly feels for her sister in such a short period of time. Same goes for Teddy really too!

Well done, this is a really great one-shot :)

Lauren

Author's Response: Hey! Thanks for reading and reviewing!

I am relieved to know that it works well as a stand-alone oneshot, and that you weren't confused and didnt feel the need to read the prequel.

I am a bad person, I like to be harsh to my poor characters, haha xP But I am glad you liked the plot and you could sympathise with Vic.

I am always a little worried about characterisation so good to now that you liked all the 3 characters and could see them being "human" with their flaws.

Hmm, I'll look into what you said, though usually my style of writing is always getting it all out in speech.

Thanks again for the thoughtful review!


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