|Review:||Secret Santa says:|
Hello! It's Santa here again :)
Okay, so I really like this as well. I think it's a really good chapter to have, however I would probably preferred to of read it first, like a sort of prologue to the story. Which would be easy to change if you wanted. I think you can just click some arrows in the 'Manage Stories' tab, but I'm not sure, I've never tried it. But I don't think it's essential to change it, it was just a suggestion. And that's probably the only CC you'll be getting ;) if you can even call it CC..
I love this bit: 'He now felt that he had something to prove. Roxanne was definitely one of his favourite cousins, but there was no way he was going to let her show him up by finding a better wand.' It made me smile because to me it almost seemed like the root of the rivalry, and how they got to the point where they were trying to prove they were 'The Better Gryffindor', which may be the reason why I mentioned it might work slightly better at the very beginning.
It makes me laugh how competitive they are; I mean, they're competitive over who has the better wand! That's like me saying my pen's better than yours, aha, I mean it won't be, and I don't think it is, but that's kind of what they're saying :O
Anyway, I really liked this chapter, and I think it was really important, as it sort of created the idea of the rivalry, which is what the whole story is kind of about.. But it works really well because it's so realistic!
I think the way you left it, means if you ever wanted, you could probably carry on with it, but I think it would be very hard to keep going and going, especially as they age, and it might be a bit repetitive, but its always an option if you wanted to :)
Happy New Year
Author's Response: I've actually tried to do that, because you're right, it does make more sense, but you apparently can't change the first chapter, just subsequent chapters, and I wrote this after I'd posted the other two chapters. I've considered just reposting it as a one-shot, but then I'd lose my reviews on it, and I like my reviews.
Thank you so much for the reviews - you were a great Santa. I really appreciate it, and I'm glad you enjoyed this story - it was fun to write, even if it's not one of my most popular ones. ♥