Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:Secret Santaaa of TGS says:

I'm finally making an appearance!!

This is a really great first chapter. I love the haunting feeling of this. The way you can tell she's not alright and yet she tries so hard to be. Tries to let the logical part of her brain tell her that everything is fine, that she's alive. But there is something underneath the surface here and i like how you've constructed this. I find it very realistic because when trauma happens it's easy for some to have that practical mind that says things are ok but the thing is, emotions are a completely different story. You can't always control that.

I think a strong point for that is just how she listens to Pye talking Psychology to her and her relying on that and trying to implement that in her own development after the war that really hits home with where this story is probably going. She tries to be this perfect recovery story- but then, there's the insomnia and the fact that she's incomplete, broken. I can only think that with all her pretend that she's fine and okay that her mental issues are going to be one of the things she's going to be struggling with throughout this story.

You have some really lovely lines here too, i could try picking some out but there were so many that really had impact. The line of the Healers not having time to talk to their patients, or her being a jigsaw are a couple that come to mind immediately. I think what you've done with this first chapter is absolutely lovely, i like the Pavarti bits because it shows a bit of who she might have been before all this happened to her.

It's really cool that you're writing about a minor character too. I'm always a fan of those and you've really just managed to make me sympathize with her and root for her. I was indifferent to her before but i feel like this piece is really giving her a voice.

Really lovely job ac_rules!!

Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 834
Submit Report: