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Review:Santa! says:
Hi again, and Merry Christmas!

I think you've got a solid opening chapter here, which sets up the story quite nicely. :) There was quite a lot of stuff to think about and pick up on here, which I like in an opening chapter. There are some questions that I have, but I'm sure some of them will be answered in the next chapter, so I'll just have to wait :P

My only problem with this chapter was that there were a few proofing errors. Most of them were minor, but were noticeable whilst reading. Of course, that requires little more than a proof-read and a quick edit. :)

I feel like you made good progress in shaping Ron and Hermione in this opening chapter. As well as describing them, you managed to hint at their personalities, and the dynamics of their relationship, through their actions, which I really liked! :) I feel like in some areas, for example with the stuttering etc. near the end, you did a really good job, but you could perhaps explore that a little further.

Anyway, great chapter! Awesome job :)

Author's Response: Hey there!
I'm glad you liked it and thought it was a good opening chapter! :)
I'll have a look through and see what I can fix, thanks for pointing that out and I'll see what I can do with exploring Ron and Hermione!
Thanks for the review and thanks for being a great secret santa! :D


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