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Review:Mystique says:
This was such a sweet one-shot. Teddy and Victoire are one of my favourite couples and I don't think there are nearly enough stories about them. So of course I was really pleased when you posted this story in my review thread.

I really enjoyed reading this story and I loved the way that you characterized Teddy. Especially with his hair turning green whenever he was around Victoire - I have to say, I loved the comment that James made about it having something to do with Mother Earth!

As I was reading the beginning of this one-shot, I noticed that you used the word honorary twice. The first "unlike his honorary uncle Ron" and the other was a couple of sentences later, "he was strictly honorary" I don't really think that you need to repeat honorary. Maybe replace it with another word or something.

I only noticed one other thing as I was reading and that was in this sentence "Victoire and he had practically." I think that instead of he, it should be him.

Anyway apart from those two things, I thoroughly enjoyed this one-shot. Do you have any ideas for writing about their first date in Hogwarts?

Charlie

Author's Response: Aww, thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed reading this! I adore Teddy and Victoire as well, and there really does need to be more stuff on them! They are so adorable!

I'm glad you like Teddy - it would be awkward otherwise, considering that the story's from his point of view!

And thanks for pointing out the honorary thing. I read over this, and it sounds a little awkward, the repetition being so close together. I'll think of a way to fix it and re-submit once the queue opens again!

And gah! I hate pronouns! Some people are like - "Such and such and me" and some are like "Such and such and I" - too many pronouns, too little time!

And I'm not sure about their first date, actually. I didn't plan for this to be anything other than a one-shot, and I don't really have any ideas for their first date, but I might write a companion piece for this later on!

And thank you so much for reviewing!


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