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Review:angel_speaks says:
Hiya! angel_speaks here (finally!!!) with your requested review! Apologies for taking so long with this...

Alrighty, I think one of the things that were important of this first chapter was how well you allowed your audience to get to know your main character. Just through her interactions with Dean and Seamus and the things they do together as friends really shows your audience who your character is, rather than just describing her personality. It's a good way to approach it, if you ask me. Also, I like how she's not like those usual 'Mary- Sue' female leads as those tend to be quite a cliche as the story progresses.

Aside from that, there were a few grammatical errors throughout the chapter. No worries though as those can be easily fixed. Maybe. You can give the chapter another look over or have a beta take a look at it :)

I think you're off to a good start here!
Hope I helped a bit.

A

Author's Response: Hey, thanks! :)

I am constantly struggling between brevity and info-dumping, haha. I'm glad at least this time it seemed decent?

And jeez, those grammar errors! I thought I'd stomped them all out. There were several places I did things on purpose, like starting a sentence with "and," but I will go back and take a fifty-third look--thanks for pointing them out! ;D


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